Female friendship -- Fiction; London (England) -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Widows -- Fiction
'You're so loyal,' murmured Lady Blixworth in admiration. 'Really
Sarah's as blind as a bat sometimes,' she reflected as she got into her
carriage.
A world of people at once inquisitive and clear-sighted would render
necessary either moral perfection or reckless defiance; indifference and
obtuseness preserve a place for that mediocrity of conduct which
characterises the majority. Society at large had hitherto found small
fault with Trix Trevalla, and what it said, when passed through Lady
Blixworth's resourceful intellect, gained greatly both in volume and in
point. No doubt she had very many gowns, no doubt she spent money,
certainly she flirted, possibly she was, for so young and pretty a
woman, a trifle indiscreet. But she gave the impression of being able to
take care of herself, and her attractions, combined with Mrs. Bonfill's
unwavering patronage, would have sufficed to excuse more errors than she
had been found guilty of. It was actually true that, while men admired,
women liked her. There was hardly a discordant voice to break in harshly
on her triumph.
There is no place like the top--especially when it is narrow, and will
not hold many at a time. The natives of it have their peculiar joy,
those who have painfully climbed theirs. Trix Trevalla seemed, to
herself at least, very near the top; if she were not quite on it, she
could put her head up over the last ledge and see it, and feel that with
one more hoist she would be able to land herself there. It is
unnecessary to recite the houses she went to, and would be (save for the
utter lack of authority such a list would have) invidious; it would be
tiresome to retail compliments and conquests. But the smallest, choicest
gatherings began to know her, and houses which were not fashionable but
something much beyond--eternal pillars supporting London
society--welcomed her. This was no success of curiosity, of whim, of a
season; it was the establishment of a position for life. From the purely
social point of view, even a match with Mervyn could do little more. So
Trix was tempted to declare in her pride.
But the case had other aspects, of course. It was all something of a
struggle, however victorious; it may be supposed that generally it is.
Security is hard to believe in, and there is always a craving to make
the strong position impregnable. Life alone at twenty-six is--lonely.
These things were in her mind, as they might have been in the thoughts
of any woman so placed. There was another consideration, more special to
herself, which could not be excluded from view: she had begun to realise
what her manner of life cost. Behold her sitting before books and bills
that revealed the truth beyond possibility of error or of gloss! Lady
Blixworth's instinct had not been at fault. Trix's mouth grew rather
hard again, and her eyes coldly resolute, as she studied these
disagreeable documents.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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