“Ho! ho! Mr Bladderchops, you have taken up the cudgels, with a vengeance. But you should remember the proverb, ‘_Come into court with clean hands_.’ What are you better than Mr Modesty? You don’t take the tithes, simply because you can’t get them. You don’t rob by act of parliament, but you wheedle the money out of some, and frighten it out of others, with the magic of your priestcraft.” Mr Anderson was in agony, and interposing said, “I think, Jack, if you had any decency or feeling for me, you wouldn’t insult a clergyman at my table. You might be satisfied with driving one out of the room.” “Ho! ho! Mr Numskull, but you’re thin in the skin! You have a wonderful leaning towards the corbies; you might fairly volunteer to defend the rector, but I beg you to let the priest answer for himself.” “And were I to answer according to your merits, a horsewhip would afford the fitting reply. Respect for my own character forbids that appeal, and protects your insolence. Yet you go not unchastised. The cupidity of your heart, like every other crime, engenders its own punishment; and though you appear to glory in acts which shock the feelings of all other men, yet, despite your coarse ribaldry, there _is_ an avenger within your own breast, which with scorpion venom stings you to madness, and will never cease its gnawings till penitence, a very unlikely consummation, pour its healing balm on ulcers scared and encrusted by the fires of iniquity!” “Ho! ho! how very familiar you black-coats are with horrors! How very glibly you can ‘talk of hell where devils dwell, and thunder out damnation.’ Now, I think you priests should be more modest. It would serve your interests better to merely consign us to purgatory.” “Your own acts, Rivers, determine such cases.” “Ho! ho! I am aware of that; but, notwithstanding, cannot a little bit of clerical hocus-pocus serve us on a pinch?” “The habitually profane have little to hope for either from God or man; they sneer at blessings mercifully offered, and too frequently die in their sins.” “Then, under all these circumstances I think it as wise to have nothing to do with your purgatory.” “I wish it may not lie your fate to go farther and fare worse.”