Such a little thing it was that temporarily turned me into a disgusted
misanthrope, nothing more than a sight of two people seen for a moment in
an arresting shock of outraged amazement before I turned a disgusted back
upon them and retreated moodily to the Hall. But the sight was enough to
throw the affair into a new perspective, and beget in me a sense of
contempt for all the actors in that midsummer comedy. "A plague on both
your houses," I muttered to myself, but I saw them no longer as the
antagonists of a romantic drama. I was suddenly influenced to a mood of
scorn. Jervaises and Banks alike seemed to me unworthy of any admiration.
The members of those families were just a crowd of self-seeking creatures
with no thought beyond their own petty interests. The Jervaises were snobs
upset by the threat to their silly prestige. Brenda was a feather-headed
madcap without a scrap of consideration for any one but herself. Banks was
an infatuated fool, and the best I could hope for him was that he would
realise the fact before it was too late. Frank, confound and confound him,
was a coarse-minded sensualist. The thought of him drove me crazy with
impatience....
And what on earth could have tempted Anne to let him kiss her, if she had
not been a crafty, worldly-minded schemer with an eye on the glories of
ruling at the Hall?
It is true that I did not actually see him kiss her. I turned away too
quickly. But the grouping left me in no doubt that if he had not kissed
her already, he was on the point of doing it. In any case he had had his
arm round her, and she had shown no signs of resisting him.
VIII
THE OUTCAST
My first impression of the curious change in demeanour shown towards me by
the Jervaises and their friends at lunch was that it had no existence
outside my own recently embittered mind. I thought that I was avoiding
them, not that they were avoiding me. It was not until I condescended to
come down from my pinnacle of conscious superiority that I realised my own
disgrace.
My effort at conversation with Mrs. Jervaise was a mere act of politeness.
"I'm afraid you were rather late this morning," I said. It was not,
perhaps, a tactful remark, but I could think of nothing else. All the
church-party were stiff with the slightly peevish righteousness of those
who have fulfilled a duty contrary to their real inclinations.
Mrs. Jervaise lifted her nose savagely. No doubt her head went with it,
but only the nose was important.
"Very late, Mr. Melhuish," she said, stared at me as if debating whether
she would not instantly give me the coup de grace, and then dipped again
to the threat of the imaginary doorway.
"Mr. Sturton give you a good sermon?" I continued, still suffering from
the delusion that I was graciously overlooking their obvious inferiority
to myself.
"He is a very able man; very able," Mrs. Jervaise said, this time without
looking up.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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