Then he abruptly addressed himself to Pauline, who was listening with a
smile on her face.
'Come now!' he said, 'tell us what you do to be always cheerful!'
'Oh!' she replied, in a joking tone, 'I try to forget all about myself,
for fear lest I should grow melancholy, and I think about others; that
occupies my mind, and makes me bear my troubles patiently.'
This reply seemed to irritate Lazare, who, prompted by a spirit of
malicious contradiction, asserted that women ought to be religious;
and he pretended that he could not understand why Pauline had ceased
to fulfil her duties for so long a time. Thereupon the girl gave her
reasons in her tranquil manner.
'It is very easily explained,' she said. 'Confession proved very
distasteful to me and hurt my feelings, and it affects many women, I
think, in the same way. Then, again, I can't bring myself to believe
things that seem contrary to reason. And, that being so, why should I
tell a lie by pretending that I do believe them? And, besides, the
unknown in no way disquiets me; it can only be a logical outcome of
life, and it seems to me best to await it as tranquilly as possible.'
'Hush! Here's the Abbé!' interrupted Chanteau, whom this conversation
was beginning to bore.
The man was dead, and the Abbé placidly finished his dinner, after
which they each drank a little glass of chartreuse.
Pauline had now assumed the management of the household. All the
purchases and every detail of the establishment came under her
inspection, and a big bunch of keys dangled from her waist. She took
over the control as a matter of course, and Véronique showed no sign
of displeasure at it. The servant had been very morose, however,
since Madame Chanteau's death, and almost appeared to be in a state
of stupor. Her affection for the dead woman seemed to revive, and she
once more began to treat Pauline with suspicious surliness. It was
to no purpose that the latter spoke softly and soothingly to her;
she took offence at a word, and could often be heard muttering and
grumbling to herself in the kitchen. And whenever, after intervals of
obstinate silence, she indulged in those muttered soliloquies, she
always appeared to be overwhelmed by stupefaction at Madame Chanteau's
death. Had she known that her mistress was going to die, she moaned to
herself? If she had had any notion of such a thing, she would never
have thought of saying what she had said. Justice before everything!
It wasn't right to kill people, even if they had their faults. But
she washed her hands of it all, she growled; it would be so much the
worse for the person who was the real cause of the misfortune. Still,
this assurance did not seem to calm her, for she went on growling and
struggling against imaginary transgressions.
'What's the matter that you are perpetually worrying yourself like
this?' Pauline asked her one day. 'We both did all we could; but we can
do nothing against death.'
Véronique shook her head.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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