The King of Schnorrers: Grotesques and FantasiesZangwill, Israel
General
The King of Schnorrers: Grotesques and Fantasies
Zangwill, Israel
Humorous stories; Jewish fiction; Jews -- England -- Fiction; London (England) -- Fiction
Her objection to fur did not, however, embrace the preparation of it,
for after school hours the little girl sat patiently stitching till
late at night, by way of apprenticeship to her future, buoyed up by
her earnings, and adding strip to strip, with the hair going all the
same way, till she had made a great black snake. Of course she did not
get anything near three-halfpence for twelve yards, like the real
"hands," but whatever she earnt went towards her Festival frocks,
which she would have got in any case. Not knowing this, she was happy
to deserve the pretty dresses she loved, and was least impatient of
her mother's chatter when Flutter-Duck dinned into her ears how pretty
she looked in them. Alas! it is to be feared Lewis was right, that
Flutter-Duck was a rattle-brain indeed. And the years which brought
Flutter-Duck prosperity, which emancipated her from personal
participation in the sewing, and gave Rachel the little bedroom to
herself, did not bring wisdom. When Flutter-Duck's felicity culminated
in a maid-servant (if only one who slept out), she was like a child
with a monkey-on-a-stick. She gave the servant orders merely to see
her arms and legs moving. She also lay late in bed to enjoy the
spectacle of the factotum making the nine o'clock coffee it had been
for so many years her own duty to prepare for the "hands." How sweetly
the waft of chicory came to her nostrils! At first her husband
remonstrated.
"It is not beautiful," he said. "You ought to get up before the
'hands' come."
Flutter-Duck flushed resentfully. "If I bin a missis, I bin a missis,"
she said with dignity. It became one of her formulæ. When the servant
developed insolence, as under Flutter-Duck's fostering familiarity she
did, Flutter-Duck would resume her dignity with a jerk.
"If I bin a missis," she would say, tossing her flighty head
haughtily, "I bin a missis."
CHAPTER II.
A MIGRATORY BIRD.
"There strode a stranger to the door,
And it was windy weather."
--TENNYSON: _The Goose_.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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