The King of Schnorrers: Grotesques and FantasiesZangwill, Israel
General
The King of Schnorrers: Grotesques and Fantasies
Zangwill, Israel
Humorous stories; Jewish fiction; Jews -- England -- Fiction; London (England) -- Fiction
"Oh, very well," interrupted the _Schnorrer_, in low, indifferent
tones.
After that there was a dead silence. The _Schnorrer_ majestically
folded some silk stockings and laid them in the box. Upon them he
packed other garments in stern, sorrowful _hauteur_. Grobstock's soul
began to tingle with pricks of compunction. Da Costa completed his
task, but could not shut the overcrowded box. Grobstock silently
seated his weighty person upon the lid. Manasseh neither resented nor
welcomed him. When he had turned the key he mutely tilted the sitter
off the box and shouldered it with consummate ease. Then he took his
staff and strode from the room. Grobstock would have followed him, but
the _Schnorrer_ waved him back.
[Illustration: "TILTED THE SITTER OFF THE BOX."]
"On Friday, then," the conscience-stricken magnate said feebly.
Manasseh did not reply; he slammed the door instead, shutting in the
master of the house.
Grobstock fell back on the bed exhausted, looking not unlike the
tumbled litter of clothes he replaced. In a minute or two he raised
himself and went to the window, and stood watching the sun set behind
the trees of the Tenterground. "At any rate I've done with him," he
said, and hummed a tune. The sudden bursting open of the door froze it
upon his lips. He was almost relieved to find the intruder was only
his wife.
"What have you done with Wilkinson?" she cried vehemently. She was a
pale, puffy-faced, portly matron, with a permanent air of remembering
the exact figure of her dowry.
"With Wilkinson, my dear? Nothing."
"Well, he isn't in the house. I want him, but cook says you've sent
him out."
"I? Oh, no," he returned, with dawning uneasiness, looking away from
her sceptical gaze.
Suddenly his pupils dilated. A picture from without had painted itself
on his retina. It was a picture of Wilkinson--Wilkinson the austere,
Wilkinson the unbending--treading the Tenterground gravel, curved
beneath a box! Before him strode the _Schnorrer_.
Never during all his tenure of service in Goodman's Fields had
Wilkinson carried anything on his shoulders but his livery. Grobstock
would have as soon dreamt of his wife consenting to wear cotton. He
rubbed his eyes, but the image persisted.
He clutched at the window curtains to steady himself.
"My Persian curtains!" cried his wife. "What is the matter with you?"
"He must be the Baal Shem himself!" gasped Grobstock unheeding.
"What is it? What are you looking at?"
"N--nothing."
Mrs. Grobstock incredulously approached the window and stared through
the panes. She saw Wilkinson in the gardens, but did not recognise him
in his new attitude. She concluded that her husband's agitation must
have some connection with a beautiful brunette who was tasting the
cool of the evening in a sedan chair, and it was with a touch of
asperity that she said: "Cook complains of being insulted by a saucy
fellow who brought home your fish."
"Oh!" said poor Grobstock. Was he never to be done with the man?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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