The King of Schnorrers: Grotesques and FantasiesZangwill, Israel
General
The King of Schnorrers: Grotesques and Fantasies
Zangwill, Israel
Humorous stories; Jewish fiction; Jews -- England -- Fiction; London (England) -- Fiction
"Not a penny!" cried the President, with a last gleam of lucidity, and
strode furiously towards the bell-pull. Then he stood still in sudden
recollection of a similar scene in the Council Chamber.
"You need not trouble to ring for a stroke," said Manasseh grimly.
"Then the Synagogue is to be profaned, then even the Benediction which
I in all loyalty and forgiveness caused to be said for the recovery of
the President of the Mahamad is to be null, a mockery in the sight of
the Holy One, blessed be He!"
The President tottered into his reading-chair.
"How much did you vow on my behalf?"
"Five pounds."
The President precipitately drew out a pocket-book and extracted a
crisp Bank of England note.
"Give it to the Chancellor," he breathed, exhausted.
"I am punished," quoth Manasseh plaintively as he placed it in his
bosom. "I should have vowed ten for you." And he bowed himself out.
In like manner did he collect other contributions that day from
Sephardic celebrities, pointing out that now a foreign Jew--Yankelé to
wit--had been admitted to their communion, it behoved them to show
themselves at their best. What a bad effect it would have on Yankelé
if a Sephardi was seen to vow with impunity! First impressions were
everything, and they could not be too careful. It would not do for
Yankelé to circulate contumelious reports of them among his kin. Those
who remonstrated with him over his extravagance he reminded that he
had only one daughter, and he drew their attention to the favourable
influence his example had had on the Saturday receipts. Not a man of
those who came after him in the Reading had ventured to offer
half-crowns. He had fixed the standard in gold for that day at least,
and who knew what noble emulation he had fired for the future?
Every man who yielded to Manasseh's eloquence was a step to reach the
next, for Manasseh made a list of donors, and paraded it reproachfully
before those who had yet to give. Withal, the most obstinate
resistance met him in some quarters. One man--a certain Rodriques,
inhabiting a mansion in Finsbury Circus--was positively rude.
"If I came in a carriage, you'd soon pull out your ten-pound note for
the Synagogue," sneered Manasseh, his blood boiling.
"Certainly I would," admitted Rodriques laughing. And Manasseh shook
off the dust of his threshold in disdain.
By reason of such rebuffs, his collection for the day only reached
about thirty pounds, inclusive of the value of some depreciated
Portuguese bonds which he good-naturedly accepted as though at par.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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