The Lady of the Barge and Others, Entire CollectionJacobs, W. W. (William Wymark)
General
The Lady of the Barge and Others, Entire Collection
Jacobs, W. W. (William Wymark)
England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Humorous stories, English; River life -- Fiction
His toilet completed, he gave a satisfied glance in the glass, and then
followed the man of war sedately down stairs. At the hall he paused,
and busied himself with the clothes-brush and hat-pad, modestly
informing his glaring friend that he could not afford to throw any
chances away, and then took his departure.
The Major sat up late that night waiting for news, but none came, and
by breakfast-time next morning his thirst for information became almost
uncontrollable. He toyed with a chop and allowed his coffee to get
cold. Then he clapped on his hat and set off to Halibut’s to know the
worst.
“Well?” he inquired, as he followed the other into his dining-room.
“I went,” said Halibut, waving him to a chair.
“Am I to congratulate you?”
“Well, I don’t know,” was the reply; “perhaps not just yet.”
“What do you mean by that?” said the Major, irascibly.
“Well, as a matter of fact,” said Halibut, “she refused me, but so
nicely and so gently that I scarcely minded it. In fact, at first I
hardly realized that she had refused me.”
The Major rose, and regarding his poor friend kindly, shook and patted
him lightly on the shoulder.
“She’s a splendid woman,” said Halibut. “Ornament to her sex,” remarked
the Major.
“So considerate,” murmured the bereaved one.
“Good women always are,” said the Major, decisively. “I don’t think I’d
better worry her to-day, Halibut, do you?”
“No, I don’t,” said Halibut, stiffly.
“I’ll try my luck to-morrow,” said the Major.
“I beg your pardon,” said Halibut.
“Eh?” said the Major, trying to look puzzled.
“You are forgetting the conditions of the game,” replied Halibut. “You
have to obtain my permission first.”
“Why, my dear fellow,” said the Major, with a boisterous laugh. “I
wouldn’t insult you by questioning your generosity in such a case. No,
no, Halibut, old fellow, I know you too well.”
He spoke with feeling, but there was an anxious note in his voice.
“We must abide by the conditions,” said Halibut, slowly; “and I must
inform you, Brill, that I intend to renew the attack myself.”
“Then, sir,” said the Major, fuming, “you compel me to say—putting all
modesty aside—that I believe the reason Mrs. Riddel would have nothing
to do with you was because she thought _somebody else_ might make a
similar offer.”
“That’s what I thought,” said Halibut, simply; “but you see now that
you have so unaccountably—so far as Mrs. Riddel is concerned—dropped
out of the running, perhaps, if I am gently persistent, she’ll take
me.”
The Major rose and glared at him.
“If you don’t take care, old chap,” said Halibut, tenderly, “you’ll
burst something.”
“Gently persistent,” repeated the Major, staring at him; “gently
persistent.”
“Remember Bruce and his spider,” smiled the other.
“You are _not_ going to propose to that poor woman nine times?” roared
his incensed friend.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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