She seemed to wring her hands under her cloak, and looked at me with an
attitude and gesture of supplication. “In great trouble,” she said, “in
great trouble! And me, I can do nothing; nor even speak, nor even
speak!”
And, notwithstanding all that I could say, she left me so, with a wave
of her hand, disappearing among the dark bushes. It may be supposed that
this was no agreeable charge to give to a guest, one who owed nothing
but pleasure and kindness to the Campbells, but had no acquaintance
beyond the surface with their concerns. They were, it is true, very free
in spirit, and seemed to have as little _dessous des cartes_ in their
life and affairs as could be imagined. But Colin was the one who was
spoken of less freely than any other in the family. He had been expected
several times since I came, but had never appeared. It seemed that he
had a way of postponing his arrival, and “of course,” it was said in the
family, never came when he was expected. I had wondered more than once
at the testy tone in which the old gentleman spoke of him sometimes, and
the line of covert defence always adopted by Charlotte. To be sure, he
was the eldest, and might naturally assume a greater independence of
action than the other young men, who were yet scarcely beyond the age of
pupilage and in their father’s house.
But from this, as well as from the still more natural and apparent
reason that to bring them bad news of any kind was most disagreeable
and inappropriate on my part, the commission I had so strangely received
hung very heavily upon me. I turned it over in my mind as I dressed for
dinner (we had been out all day, and dinner was much later than usual in
consequence) with great perplexity and distress. Was I bound to give a
message forced upon me in such a way? If the lady had news of any
importance to give, why did she turn away from the house, where she
could have communicated it at once, and confide it to a stranger? On the
other hand, would I be justified in keeping back anything that might be
of so much importance to them? It might perhaps be something for which
she did not wish to give her authority. Sometimes people in such
circumstances will even condescend to write an anonymous letter to give
the warning they think necessary, without betraying to the victims of
misfortune that anyone whom they know is acquainted with it. Here was a
justification for the strange step she had taken. It might be done in
the utmost kindness to them, if not to me; and what if there might be
some real danger afloat and Colin be in peril, as she said? I thought
over these things anxiously before I went downstairs, but even up to the
moment of entering that bright and genial drawing-room, so full of
animated faces and cheerful talk, I had not made up my mind what I
should do. When we returned to it after dinner I was still uncertain. It
was late, and the children were sent to bed. The boys went round to the
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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