Well put, Jack; but we have a _salvo_ for that; plaintiff happen'd not to have the note in his pocket, but promis'd to deliver it up, when call'd thereunto by defendant. JACK. That will do rarely. SERJEANT. Let the defence be a secret, for I see we have able people to deal with. But come, child, not to lose time, have you carefully conn'd those instructions I gave you? JACK. Yes, Sir. SERJEANT. Well, that we shall see. How many points are the great object of practice? JACK. Two. SERJEANT. Which are they? JACK. The first is to put a man into possession of what is his right. SERJEANT. The second? JACK. Either to deprive a man of what is _really_ his right, or to keep him as long as possible _out_ of possession. SERJEANT. Good boy! To gain the last end, what are the best means to be us'd? JACK. Various and many are the legal modes of delay. SERJEANT. Name them. JACK. Injunctions, demurrers, sham-pleas, writs of error, rejoinders, sur-rejoinders, rebutters, sur-rebutters, replications, exceptions, essoigns, and imparlance. SERJEANT. [_To himself._] Fine instruments in the hands of a man, who knows how to use them.--But now, Jack, we come to the point: if an able advocate has his choice in a cause, (which if he is in reputation he may readily have,) which side should he choose, the right, or the wrong? JACK. A great lawyer's business, is always to make choice of the wrong. SERJEANT. And prythee why so? JACK. Because a good cause can speak for itself, whilst a bad one demands an able counsellor to give it a colour. SERJEANT. Very well. But in what respects will this answer to the lawyer himself? JACK. In a two-fold way; firstly, his fees will be large in proportion to the dirty work he is to do. SERJEANT. Secondly?-- JACK. His reputation will rise, by obtaining the victory in a desperate cause. SERJEANT. Right, boy.--Are you ready in the case of the cow? JACK. Pretty well, I believe. SERJEANT. Give it then. JACK. First of April, anno seventeen hundred and blank, John a Nokes was indicted by blank, before blank, in the county of blank, for stealing a cow, contra pacem etcet.--and against the statute in that case provided and made, to prevent stealing of cattle. SERJEANT. Go on. JACK. Said Nokes was convicted upon the said statute. SERJEANT. What follow'd upon?-- JACK. Motion in arrest of judgment, made by counsellor Puzzle. First, Because the field from whence the cow was convey'd is laid in the indictment as _round_, but turn'd out upon proof to be _square_. SERJEANT. That's well: a valid objection. JACK. Secondly, Because in said indictment the colour of the cow is called red, there being no such things in rerum natura as red cows, no more than black lions, spread eagles, flying griffins, or blue boars. SERJEANT. Well put. JACK.