The Lanchester traditionBradby, G. F. (Godfrey Fox)
History
The Lanchester tradition
Bradby, G. F. (Godfrey Fox)
Endowed public schools (Great Britain) -- Fiction
The boys, of course, had always known that “Whisky Toddler” drank like
a fish; but opinion on the staff was acutely divided. There is no
question that has so many sides to it as drink, nor one about which it
is so hard to arrive at any convincing conclusion. The very fact that
Mr. Todd’s nose was red and his eyes were watery was, to some, a proof
of his innocence. For people are sure to say that a man with a red nose
and watery eyes drinks; whereas anyone _may_ have a red nose and weak
eyes without drinking, and it is horribly unfair that a man should be
treated as a moral leper because of some physical infirmity. There were
many, therefore, besides Mr. Plummer who believed, and still believe,
that poor Todd was “hardly treated”; and poor Todd said nothing to
discourage their belief.
His place was taken by a man of unprepossessing manners and abrupt
activity--Pigeon was his name. There was a certain mystery about his
past. Some said that he had once been a spy in the pay of the Russian
police; others, that he had been a proctor’s bulldog at Oxford; others,
that he had been a Scotland Yard detective. At all events, there could
be no doubt that it was as a detective that he was brought by the “New
Gus” to Chiltern. A porter is assumed to possess tact; but Pigeon had
none--no gift of shutting his eyes on occasions when eyes are better
shut. And so it came to pass that he discovered Mr. Chowdler’s Prætor
smoking among the rhododendrons in Colonus, and reported him to the
headmaster.
At Chiltern the captain of every house was called its “Prætor” and
wielded vast authority. In a post for which character was the prime
consideration, position in the school was only of secondary importance.
Hence it happened that, though le Willow had with difficulty fought
his way into the senior Fifth, he was Prætor of Mr. Chowdler’s house.
But, though not distinguished intellectually, he was captain designate
of the eleven for the succeeding year, a very fair change bowler, and
a bat with a most taking style. He enjoyed the entire confidence of
his housemaster and the respect of his fellows. It was regrettable,
therefore, from every point of view, that he should have been smoking
behind the rhododendrons in Colonus; and still more regrettable that,
having been smoking, he should have been discovered.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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