"I was about to protest again, when the paint-box came forward, and
balancing itself in an artistic, undecided kind of way on two
camel's-hair brushes which seemed to serve it for feet, addressed the
Jack-in-a-box.
"'Never dip your paint into the water. Never put your brush into your
mouth----'
"'That's not evidence,' said the Jack-in-a-box.
"'Your notions are crude,' said the paint-box loftily; 'it's in
print, and here, all of it, or words to that effect; with which he
touched the lid, as a gentleman might lay his hand upon his heart.
"'It's not evidence,' repeated the Jack-in-a-box. 'Let us proceed.'
"'Take her to pieces and see what she's made of, if you please,'
tittered a pretty German toy that moved to a tinkling musical
accompaniment. 'If her works are available after that it will be an
era in natural science.'
"The idea tickled me, and I laughed.
"'Hard-hearted wretch!' growled the Dowager Doll.
"'Dip her in water and leave her to soak on a white soup plate,' said
the paint-box; 'if that doesn't soften her feelings, deprive me of my
medal from the School of Art!'
"'Give her a stiff neck!' muttered the mandarin. 'Ching Fo! give her a
stiff neck.'
"'Knock her teeth out,' growled the rake in a scratchy voice; and then
the tools joined in chorus.
"'Take her out when its fine and leave her out when it's wet, and lose
her in----
"'The coal hole,' said the spade.
"'The hay field,' said the rake.
"'The shrubbery,' said the hoe.
"This difference of opinion produced a quarrel, which in turn seemed
to affect the general behavior of the toys, for a disturbance arose
which the Jack-in-a-box vainly endeavored to quell. A dozen voices
shouted for a dozen different punishments and (happily for me) each
toy insisted upon its own wrongs being the first to be avenged, and no
one would hear of the claims of any one else being attended to for an
instant. Terrible sentences were passed, which I either failed to hear
through the clamor then, or have forgotten now. I have a vague idea
that several voices cried that I was to be sent to wash in somebody's
pocket; that the work-basket wished to cram my mouth with unfinished
needlework; and that through all the din the thick voice of my old
leather ball monotonously repeated:
"'Throw her into the dust-hole.'
"Suddenly a clear voice pierced the confusion, and Rosa tripped up.
"'My dears,' she began, 'the only chance of restoring order is to
observe method. Let us follow our usual rule of precedence. I claim
the first turn as the prisoner's oldest toy.'
"'That you are not, Miss,' snapped the dowager; 'I was in the family
for fifty years.'
"'In the family. Yes, ma'am; but you were never her doll in
particular. I was her very own, and she kept me longer than any other
plaything. My judgment must be first.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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