End of the world -- Fiction; Epidemics -- Fiction; Science fiction; Twenty-first century -- Fiction
It was seldom indeed that we escaped, to use an old-fashioned phrase,
scot free. Our dainty fare was often exchanged for blows and
imprisonment. Once, when thirteen years of age, I was sent for a month
to the county jail. I came out, my morals unimproved, my hatred to my
oppressors encreased tenfold. Bread and water did not tame my blood,
nor solitary confinement inspire me with gentle thoughts. I was angry,
impatient, miserable; my only happy hours were those during which I
devised schemes of revenge; these were perfected in my forced solitude,
so that during the whole of the following season, and I was freed early
in September, I never failed to provide excellent and plenteous fare
for myself and my comrades. This was a glorious winter. The sharp frost
and heavy snows tamed the animals, and kept the country gentlemen by
their firesides; we got more game than we could eat, and my faithful
dog grew sleek upon our refuse.
Thus years passed on; and years only added fresh love of freedom, and
contempt for all that was not as wild and rude as myself. At the age of
sixteen I had shot up in appearance to man’s estate; I was tall and
athletic; I was practised to feats of strength, and inured to the
inclemency of the elements. My skin was embrowned by the sun; my step
was firm with conscious power. I feared no man, and loved none. In
after life I looked back with wonder to what I then was; how utterly
worthless I should have become if I had pursued my lawless career. My
life was like that of an animal, and my mind was in danger of
degenerating into that which informs brute nature. Until now, my savage
habits had done me no radical mischief; my physical powers had grown up
and flourished under their influence, and my mind, undergoing the same
discipline, was imbued with all the hardy virtues. But now my boasted
independence was daily instigating me to acts of tyranny, and freedom
was becoming licentiousness. I stood on the brink of manhood; passions,
strong as the trees of a forest, had already taken root within me, and
were about to shadow with their noxious overgrowth, my path of life.
I panted for enterprises beyond my childish exploits, and formed
distempered dreams of future action. I avoided my ancient comrades, and
I soon lost them. They arrived at the age when they were sent to fulfil
their destined situations in life; while I, an outcast, with none to
lead or drive me forward, paused. The old began to point at me as an
example, the young to wonder at me as a being distinct from themselves;
I hated them, and began, last and worst degradation, to hate myself. I
clung to my ferocious habits, yet half despised them; I continued my
war against civilization, and yet entertained a wish to belong to it.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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