She did not answer. He rose and looked down upon her. One tendril of
her golden hair, like silk in texture, caressed her fine-grained cheek,
delicately contrasted against its alluring color. He would have liked
to press it closer to the skin with his fingers ... quite gently. But
he said:
"I guess you and I don't understand each other very well, and, if we
don't, it ain't any use in our talking further. As for advisin' you
about your business...."
Jane blew on her ash.
"I just tried to show you how to start right, accordin' to my notion,
and if it made you mad I'm sorry.
"After all, it don't make so much difference what other folks think of
us. It's what we think of ourselves that counts most, but none of us
can get clear away from the other _hombre's_ ideas."
That twinkle crept back in to his eyes. Her little frame fairly
bristled independence and self-sufficiency; it was in the pert set of
her head, the poise of her square shoulders, the languid swinging of
one small foot.
"I think that you think a lot of yourself, ma'am. That's more 'n most
folks can say."
She rose as he reached for his hat.
"I'm glad to have your opinion on the proportions of my job," she said
briefly, "and for that I am glad that you came in."
The oblique rebuke could not be misunderstood.
"I'm complimented," he replied, and, although she looked frankly and
impersonally up at him, she had a quick fear that despite her assurance
this man was leaving her with a strange feeling of inferiority, and
when he went through the doorway into the night she was quite certain
he was smiling merrily.
She stood until the sound of his footsteps dwindled, then turned to the
table and stood idly caressing the wood. Her fingers encountered
something which she picked up and examined, at first abstractedly. It
was a bit of straw, the one Beck had refused and, which drawn, would
have made him her right hand man. She moved towards the fire to toss it
into the flames; checked herself and, instead, put it between the
covers of a book which lay handy.
She stood on the stone hearth thinking of what he had said, cigarette
smoke curling up her small hand and delicate wrist. The offended
feeling subsided and, wonderingly, she tried to restimulate it; the
sensation would not return! Of a sudden she felt small and weak and of
little consequence.
So he doubted, even, that she could be herself!
She dropped the stub of her cigarette into the fire and, frowning,
reached for another, and tapped its end on the mantel. She struck a
match and put the white cylinder to her lips. Then, quite slowly, she
waved the glare out and tossed the tiny stick into the coals. With a
movement which was so deliberate that it was almost weary she dropped
the unlighted cigarette after it. Slight as was the gesture there was
in it something of finality.
The coals were dimmed with ash before she moved to walk slowly to the
window and look out. It was cold and still.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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