England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction; Married people -- Fiction; Mystery fiction
“S. and E. M.?” Those last two letters might stand for the initials of
my husband’s name--his true name--Eustace Macallan. In this case the
first letter (“S.”) in all probability indicated _her_ name. What right
had she to associate herself with him in that manner? I considered a
little--my memory exerted itself--I suddenly called to mind that Eustace
had sisters. He had spoken of them more than once in the time before our
marriage. Had I been mad enough to torture myself with jealousy of my
husband’s sister? It might well be so; “S.” might stand for his sister’s
Christian name. I felt heartily ashamed of myself as this new view of
the matter dawned on me. What a wrong I had done to them both in my
thoughts! I turned the photograph, sadly and penitently, to examine the
portraits again with a kinder and truer appreciation of them.
I naturally looked now for a family likeness between the two faces.
There was no family likeness; on the contrary, they were as unlike each
other in form and expression as faces could be. _Was_ she his sister,
after all? I looked at her hands, as represented in the portrait. Her
right hand was clasped by Eustace; her left hand lay on her lap. On the
third finger, distinctly visible, there was a wedding-ring. Were any of
my husband’s sisters married? I had myself asked him the question when
he mentioned them to me, and I perfectly remembered that he had replied
in the negative.
Was it possible that my first jealous instinct had led me to the right
conclusion after all? If it had, what did the association of the three
initial letters mean? What did the wedding-ring mean? Good Heavens! was
I looking at the portrait of a rival in my husband’s affections--and was
that rival his Wife?
I threw the photograph from me with a cry of horror. For one terrible
moment I felt as if my reason was giving way. I don’t know what would
have happened, or what I should have done next, if my love for Eustace
had not taken the uppermost place among the contending emotions that
tortured me. That faithful love steadied my brain. That faithful love
roused the reviving influences of my better and nobler sense. Was the
man whom I had enshrined in my heart of hearts capable of such base
wickedness as the bare idea of his marriage to another woman implied?
No! Mine was the baseness, mine the wickedness, in having even for a
moment thought it of him!
I picked up the detestable photograph from the floor, and put it back
in the book. I hastily closed the cupboard door, fetched the library
ladder, and set it against the book-case. My one idea now was the idea
of taking refuge in employment of any sort from my own thoughts. I felt
the hateful suspicion that had degraded me coming back again in spite of
my efforts to repel it. The books! the books! my only hope was to absorb
myself, body and soul, in the books.
I had one foot on the ladder, when I heard the door of the room
open--the door which communicated with the hall.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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