Mrs. Lawton entered the room as her husband was putting back the
turkey. She offered no remarks beyond a scant “mornin’!” to Jessica, and
directed a scowl toward Lawton, before which he promptly disappeared.
She replied curtly in the negative when Jessica asked if there was
anything she could do; but the novelty of the offer seemed to slowly
impress her mind, for after a time she began to talk of her own accord.
Ben had come home drunk the night before, she said; there wasn’t
anything new in that, but it was decidedly new for him to bring
something to eat with him. He said he’d been carrying in coal, which was
her reason for believing he had been really shaving shingles or breaking
up old barrels. He couldn’t tell the truth if he tried--it wasn’t in
him not to lie. The worst of his getting drunk was he was so pesky
good-natured the next day. Her father used always to have a headache
under similar conditions, and make things peculiarly interesting for
everybody round about, from her mother at the helm of the boat to the
nigger-boy and the mule on the tow-path ahead. That was the way all
other men behaved, too: that is, all who were good for anything. But
Ben, he just grinned and did more chores than usual, and hung around
generally, as if everybody was bound to like him because he had made a
fool of himself.
This monologue of information and philosophy was not delivered
consecutively, but came in disjointed and irrelevant instalments, spread
over a considerable space of time. There was nothing in it all which
suggested a reply, and Jessica did not even take the trouble to
listen very attentively. Her own thoughts were a more than sufficient
occupation.
The failure of the experiment upon which she had ventured was looming
in unpleasant bulk before her. Every glance about her, every word which
fell upon her ears, furnished an added reason why she was not going to
be able to live on the lines she had laid out. Viewed even as a visit,
the experience was hateful. Contemplated as a career, it was simply
impossible. Rather than bear it, she would go back to Tecumseh or New
York; and rather than do this, she would kill herself.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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