The Ass too has had the assurance, to throw down his gauntlet in this
tournament, tho’ with no better a face than his competitor, the bird
of _Minerva_. But what person, tho’ ever so little inclined, to the
talents of observation, could possibly avoid taking notice of the
uncommon _prudery_ of the _Cat_. He, or she, male, or female, shall
take their post close by a fire side, with all the conformity, with
all that respectable quality, which should entitle him or her to a
notable attention. Nay the old ladies, vulgarly called old women,
have been so hardy as to say, that Cats are witches, that they can
prognosticate, foretell, predict, and what not? and it is affirmed
by some of those venerable matrons, that a cat has made an Almanack.
I have heard indeed, and with some aspect of credibility, that a Cat
is something barometrical, or in plainer terms bears a resemblance
to a weather glass; that when she washes her face, it is a sign of
good weather, and when she is in her frolicks, it will blow hard, but
how to attest these diagnostic symptoms is above our capacity, and
even Pliny himself the natural historian would be puzzled to decide a
matter of such consequence.
To possess two qualities eminently distinct, is the inheritance
of no creature upon earth. The Dog is faithful, vigilant, docile,
and of an excellent scent. The Horse boasts of many virtues, and
amiable endowments; his speed, his strength and other illustrious
talents recommend him to man: So of other animals; but none of these
enumerates good qualities diametrically opposite each other. Now
in the Cat, there appears the utmost austerity, with the greatest
levity. A rake and a senator are most wonderfully compounded. Who can
analize these differing ingredients, so demure a puritan on a sudden,
converted into the most absolute debauchè? One time sitting for four
or five hours in the attitude of solemnity, and then on sudden break
out into the most dissolute festivity. These qualities, so dissonant,
so very opposite to each other, must indicate something superior in
the animal, whose history we are at present writing, and we think we
have proved this superiority of the Cat above all other animals so
incontestibly, that all historians, ancient and modern, must submit
to our sublime decree, or else confute our at present irrefragable
argument in some future treatise.
CHAP. II.
_Of the Lyon_, &c.
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