Tom did not approve of his Mistress’s niggarly temper, and though
he made several attempts upon her larder, he seldom availed himself
of the expedition, being glad to get off with whole bones, he being
a rival in these purloinings with the old taylor, his master, who
was as narrowly watched as himself in these kind of invasions, and
whom his wife had starved, cudgel’d, and cuckolded into the bargain.
However, one day, Tom laid a plot, and being determined to assuage
the cries of hunger, he resolutely attacked two pound of beef-stakes,
which were contrary to former caution left to his mercy, as the
mistress had indulged herself too plentifully with the ratifai of
St. _Giles_’s, commonly called _Gin_. The maid had been absent by
accident, at the time of this depredation, Tom prudently withdrew,
when he had eat up his delicious cates, and left the blame to fall
upon either the maid, or the old taylor, the former of which fasted
that day for her negligence, and was discharged without payment of
her wages, while old snip had like to have been destroyed by the
weight of the goose, with which his tender rib did belabour him to
his no small mortification, and of which he lay ill for three days to
his wife’s utter discontent, as she was forced to hire a journeyman
to finish some work he had begun.
CHAP. VI.
_The Maid Servant takes out a warrant against Tom: He is
arrested, and put into a Jail, where he is forced to pay garnish._
The maid servant being thus deprived of her wages by her rapacious
mistress, and knowing that ridicule would be the best method to
expose her, went to a bailiff, a relation of her own, and told him
the case, adding, that she thought the nearest way to obtain an
effectual remedy both for her wages and her private satisfaction,
was to expose her mistress by some stroke of ridicule, which
would be matter of laughter to all the neighbours, who hated her
for her avarice and rapine, and that a comical revenge had struck
into her head on a sudden, which she determined that very day, with
his assistance to put into execution, he promised not only to give
her the best assistance in his power, but also to be himself the
instrument of her immediate revenge, whereupon she asked him if
he would take upon him to arrest the Cat, who by eating the beef
stakes, had been the occasion of her being deprived of her place,
together with her wages; she owned that she had no particular pique
of resentment against the Cat, who had been for many weeks a fellow
sufferer with herself in the article of starving, and she protested
that she would have done the same had she been a Cat, but as she
was a Woman, and not used to eat raw beef, she therefore had never
thought of stealing them; that it often happened, she used to steal a
slice of bread and cheese for her poor old master, whom her barbarous
mistress had also locked up the victuals from, and that she had run
the risque to serve him, though his wife had privately marked the
bread and cheese.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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