The next morning I left very early, and in a few hours reached my
destination and was enrolled among the pupils of B.... Seminary, I
shall not dwell long on my school days, although I might devote much of
space to them. I was not a popular girl in the school--I was too cold,
too reserved, and some of the girls said too proud. I took no pleasure
in girlish sports, but my chief amusement was reading. I would retire
to a corner of the school room and while the other girls were at
play--I would be plunged in the mysteries of Mrs. Radcliffs novels, or
some other work of the same character. Frequently the Principal
insisted on my shutting up my book and going out to play, but I would
creep back when she had left the schoolroom, and resume my favorite
occupation. I remained at school seven years, and during that time I
never once visited home, for my father made a special agreement that I
was to spend my vacation at school.
It is strange that, considering the prominent part I had played in the
Court of Venus, that up to the age of seventeen, not a single thought
concerning the relation of the sexes ever entered my head. I had up to
that age never experienced the slightest longing or desire and looked
on all men with the utmost indifference. And yet I knew that I was
called beautiful and was the envy of all my school fellows.
I have not yet given a description of myself to the reader and it is
nothing but right that I should do so. At the age of seventeen my
charms were well developed, and although they had not attained the ripe
fullness which a few years later was the admiration and delight of all
my adorers, still I possessed all the insignia of womanhood. In stature
I was above the medium height, my hair was a dark auburn and hung in
massive bands on a white neck. My eyes were a deep blue and possessed a
languishing voluptuous expression; they were fringed with long silky
eyelashes and arched with brows so finely pencilled that I have often
been accused of using art to give them their graceful appearance. My
features were classically regular, my skin of dazzling whiteness, my
shoulders were gracefully rounded and my bust faultless in its
contours. My more secret charms I shall describe at some future time
when I shall have to expose them to the reader's gaze.
I have said that up to the age of seventeen I had never experienced the
slightest sexual desire. The spark of voluptuousness which has ever
since burnt so fiercely in my breast was destined to be lighted up by
one of my own sex. Yes, dear Laura, it was you who first taught me the
delights and joys of love; it was you who first kindled that flame of
desire that has caused me to experience twelve years of delirious
bliss; it was to your gentle teaching, sweet friend, that I owe my
initiation in all the mysteries of the Court of Venus; it was your soft
hand that pointed out to me that path of pleasure--and all the delight
shown on the wayside. The incident happened in this manner:
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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