The Life of Charlotte Brontë — Volume 1Gaskell, Elizabeth Cleghorn
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The Life of Charlotte Brontë — Volume 1
Gaskell, Elizabeth Cleghorn
Brontë, Charlotte, 1816-1855; Novelists, English -- 19th century -- Biography
The Hegers have discovered, since the publication of "Villette," that at
this beginning of her career as English teacher in their school, the
conduct of her pupils was often impertinent and mutinous in the highest
degree. But of this they were unaware at the time, as she had declined
their presence, and never made any complaint. Still it must have been a
depressing thought to her at this period, that her joyous, healthy,
obtuse pupils were so little answerable to the powers she could bring to
bear upon them; and though from their own testimony, her patience,
firmness, and resolution, at length obtained their just reward, yet with
one so weak in health and spirits, the reaction after such struggles as
she frequently had with her pupils, must have been very sad and painful.
She thus writes to her friend E.:--
"April, 1843.
"Is there any talk of your coming to Brussels? During the bitter cold
weather we had through February, and the principal part of March, I
did not regret that you had not accompanied me. If I had seen you
shivering as I shivered myself, if I had seen your hands and feet as
red and swelled as mine were, my discomfort would just have been
doubled. I can do very well under this sort of thing; it does not
fret me; it only makes me numb and silent; but if you were to pass a
winter in Belgium, you would be ill. However, more genial weather is
coming now, and I wish you were here. Yet I never have pressed you,
and never would press you too warmly to come. There are privations
and humiliations to submit to; there is monotony and uniformity of
life; and, above all, there is a constant sense of solitude in the
midst of numbers. The Protestant, the foreigner, is a solitary being,
whether as teacher or pupil. I do not say this by way of complaining
of my own lot; for though I acknowledge that there are certain
disadvantages in my present position, what position on earth is
without them? And, whenever I turn back to compare what I am with
what I was--my place here with my place at Mrs. ---'s for instance--I
am thankful. There was an observation in your last letter which
excited, for a moment, my wrath. At first, I thought it would be
folly to reply to it, and I would let it die. Afterwards, I
determined to give one answer, once for all. 'Three or four people,'
it seems, 'have the idea that the future _epoux_ of Mademoiselle
Bronte is on the Continent.' These people are wiser than I am. They
could not believe that I crossed the sea merely to return as teacher
to Madame Hegers. I must have some more powerful motive than respect
for my master and mistress, gratitude for their kindness, &c., to
induce me to refuse a salary of 50_l_. in England, and accept one of
16_l_. in Belgium. I must, forsooth, have some remote hope of
entrapping a husband somehow, or somewhere. If these charitable
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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