The Lightning Conductor Discovers AmericaWilliamson, C. N. (Charles Norris)
General
The Lightning Conductor Discovers America
Williamson, C. N. (Charles Norris)
Automobiles -- Fiction
We have a real live millionairess on the _Evangeline_ an American
millionairess from the West somewhere, a Mrs. Shuster. She's a widow,
about forty-five, common but kind. For "two twos" I believe she would
adopt the Stormy Petrel. She's been in Switzerland, where people used to
go to eat chocolate and see mountains, and where they now go to make
proposals of peace. I believe she made some, but nobody listened much,
so she came away disappointed and fiercely determined to do good
somewhere or know the reason why! She's a stout, wildly untidy woman
whose mouse-coloured hair is always coming down, though it's freely
dotted with irrelevant tortoise-shell combs; and whose elaborate clothes
look somehow insecure, the way scree does on the side of a mountain. Her
ideas leap out of her brain like rabbits out of holes, and then go
scuttling away again, to be followed ineffectively by others: and her
latest is benefiting the Ship's Mystery. She's sure he can't be
American, because Americans don't have eyes like wells of ink, and
short, close black beards like those of English or Italian naval
officers. Her theory is that he's a subject of some belligerent country,
who has conscientious scruples against fighting. The fact that he sailed
from New York on the _Lusitania_ last spring can't convince the lady
that she is wrong in her "deductions," as Sherlock Holmes would say. It
only complicates the mystery a little and adds ramifications.
To my mind, Mr. Storm hasn't at all the look of a man opposed to
fighting. I believe he would love it. The odd thing to me is, where
there's such wide opportunity on one side or the other, that he isn't
doing it. And Jack thinks so, too. I do hope he isn't a spy or an
anarchist, or a person who takes passage on ships to blow them up or
signal to submarines or something.
Of course I haven't suggested such horrors to Mrs. Shuster; and
yesterday she made up an exploring party for the steerage, so as to open
communications with the desired protege. The first officer had promised
to take her, and she asked me to join them. I happened to be talking to
Patsey Moore at the time, and saw by the way her eyes lighted that she
was dying to go, too. So I got her included in the invitation.
It was a lovely calm day, the long level lines of the sea punctuated
with porpoises, dear things like giant commas. A good many of the
third-class passengers were writing letters on their knees, and the
_quaintest_ paper. Among these was the Man of Mystery; and Mrs. Shuster
sailed up to him, billowing out in the breeze of her own enthusiasm.
"We've all heard of you," she said. "And the splendid things you did on
the _Arabic_."
Actually the man blushed! He rose up politely; and as he is very tall
and straight, rather thin, and extremely dark, he reminded me of a cedar
towering beside one of those squat Dutch trees cut into the shape of
some domestic animal.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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