The Lights and Shadows of Real LifeArthur, T. S. (Timothy Shay)
General
The Lights and Shadows of Real Life
Arthur, T. S. (Timothy Shay)
Conduct of life -- Fiction; Temperance -- Fiction
On the occasion referred too, he passed through all these changes,
and finally sunk off to sleep by the warm stove. Being in the way,
and also in danger of tumbling upon the floor, some of us removed
him to an old settee, where he slept soundly, entertaining us with
rather an unmusical serenade. There were two or three mischievous
fellows about the place, and one of them suggested it would be
capital fun to black W--'s face, and "make a darkey of him." No
sooner said than done. Some lamp-black and oil were mixed together
in an old tin cup, and a coat of this paint laid over the face of
W--, who, all unconscious of what had been done, slept on as
soundly and snored as loudly as ever. Full two hours passed away
before he awoke. Staggering up to the bar, he called for another
glass of whisky toddy, while we made the old bar-room ring again
with our peals of laughter.
"What are you all laughing at?" he said, as he became aware that he
was the subject of merriment, and turning his black face around upon
the company as he spoke.
"Give us Zip Coon, old fellow!" called out one of the "boys" who had
helped him to his beautiful mask.
"No! no! Lucy Long! Give us Lucy Long!" cried another.
"Can't you dance Jim Crow? Try it. I'll sing the 'wheel about and
turn about, and do jist so.' Now begin."
And the last speaker commenced singing Jim Crow.
W--neither understood nor relished all this. But the more angry
and mystified he became, the louder laughed the company and the
freer became their jests. At last, in a passion, he swore at us
lustily, and leaving the barroom, in high dudgeon, took his horse
from the stable and rode off.
It was past eleven o'clock. The night was cold, and a ride of two
miles made W--sober enough to understand that he had been rather
drunk, and was still a good deal "in for it;" and that it wouldn't
exactly do for his wife to see him just as he was. So he rode a mile
past his house,--and then back again, at a slow trot, concluding
that by this time the good woman was fast asleep. And so she was. He
entered the house, crept silently up stairs, and got quietly into
bed, without his better half being wiser therefor.
On the next morning, Mrs. W--awoke first. But what was her
surprise and horror, upon rising up, to see, instead of her lawful
husband, what she thought a strapping negro, as black as charcoal,
lying at her side. Her first impulse was to scream; but her presence
of mind in this trying position, enabled her to keep silence. You
may be sure that she didn't remain long in such a close contact with
Sir Darkey. Not she! For, slipping out of bed quickly, but
noiselessly, she glided from the room, and was soon down stairs in
the kitchen, where a stout, two-fisted Irish girl was at work
preparing breakfast.
"Oh! dear! Kitty!" she exclaimed, panting for breath, and looking as
pale as a ghost, "have you seen any thing of Mr. W--, this
morning?"
"Och! no. But what ails ye? Ye're as white as a shate?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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