FIRING ON A FLEA FOR A SQUIRREL. In 1841, while serving a term in the Illinois legislature, Lincoln was the longest of the Sangamon representatives, distinguished as the Long Nine. They were much hampered by an old member who tried to put a stopper upon any measure on the set ground that it was "un-con-sti-tu-tional." Lincoln was selected to "spike his gun." A measure was introduced benefiting the Sangamon district, so that its electee might befittingly push it, and defend it. He was warrantably its usher when the habitual interrupter bawled his stereotyped: "Unconstitutional!" The "quasher" is reported as follows in the local press, if not in the journal of the House, which one need not, perhaps, consult: "Mr. Speaker," said the son of the Sangamon Vale, "the attack of the member from Wabash County upon the un-con-sti-tu-tion-al-i-ty of this measure reminds me of an old friend of mine. "He k a peculiar-looking old fellow, with shaggy, overhanging eyebrows, and a pair of spectacles under them. (This description fitted the Wabash member, at whom all gaze was directed.) "One morning just after the old soul got up, he imagined he saw a gray squirrel on a tree near his house. So he took down his rifle, and fired at the squirrel, as he believed, but the squirrel paid no attention to the shot. He loaded and fired again and again, until, at the thirteenth shot, he set down his gun impatiently, and said to his boy, looking on: "'Boy, there's something wrong about this rifle.' "'Rifle's all right--I know it is,' answered the boy; 'but where's your squirrel?' "'Don't you see him, humped up about half-way up the tree?' inquired the old man, peering over his spectacles and getting mystified. "'No, I don't,' responded the boy; and then turning and looking into his father's face, he exclaimed: 'Yes, I spy your squirrel! You have been firing at a flea on your own brow!'" This modern version of seeing the mote and not the beam in one's own eye smothered the member for Wabash in laughter, and he _dropped_ the standard objection of "unconstitutional" as he had not his mark. * * * * * THE CREAM OF THE JOKE.