The literature of kissing : $b gleaned from history, poetry, fiction, and anecdoteBombaugh, Charles C. (Charles Carroll)
History
The literature of kissing : $b gleaned from history, poetry, fiction, and anecdote
Bombaugh, Charles C. (Charles Carroll)
Kissing
I saw Esau kissing Kate,
And the fact is we all three saw;
For I saw Esau, he saw me,
And she saw I saw Esau.
* * * * *
Bus—to kiss. Re-bus—to kiss again. Blunderbus—two girls kissing each
other. Omnibus—to kiss all the girls in the room. Bus-ter—a general
kisser. E pluri-bus unum—a thousand kisses in one.
* * * * *
An editor defines a blunderbuss as kissing the wrong girl,—just as though
it were possible to be wrong in kissing any girl. A blunderbuss is for
men to kiss one another, as Frenchmen do, or for girls to kiss one
another, as they often do for want of a man to kiss them.
* * * * *
A young fellow in San Francisco suddenly snatched a kiss from a lady
friend, and excused his conduct by saying that it was a sort of temporary
insanity that now and then came upon him. When he arose to take his leave
the pitying damsel said to him, “If you ever feel any more such fits
coming on, you had better come right here, where your infirmity is known,
and we will take care of you.”
* * * * *
This story is told of an English barrister on his travels. As the coach
was about to start after breakfast, the modest limb of the law approached
the landlady, a pretty Quakeress, who was seated near the fire, and said
he could not think of going without first giving her a kiss. “Friend,”
said she, “thee must not do it.” “Oh, by heavens, I will!” replied the
barrister. “Well, friend, as thou hast sworn, thee may do it; but thee
must not make a practice of it.”
* * * * *
Here is an episode from a Palais Royal farce. A. is making love to C.,
who is B.’s wife, and scents B.’s coat with musk. A. is on the point of
kissing C., when he smells mischief in the air. She waits, expectant of
the embrace; he turns up his nose, snuffs, and changes the tone of his
remark. Tableaux!
* * * * *
The electrical kiss is performed by means of the electrical stool. Let
a lady challenge a gentleman not acquainted with the experiment to give
her a salute. The lady thereupon mounts the glass stool, taking hold of
the chain connected with the prime conductor. The machine then being set
in motion, the gentleman approaches the lady and attempts to imprint the
seal of affection upon her coral lips, when a spark will fly in his face
which effectually checkmates his intentions.
* * * * *
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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