The Little Brown Jug at KildareNicholson, Meredith
General
The Little Brown Jug at Kildare
Nicholson, Meredith
Fathers and daughters -- Fiction; Governors -- Fiction; Humorous stories; North Carolina -- Fiction; South Carolina -- Fiction
One tiny fist this time! Ardmore was sure of it. Her indignation against
the Osbornes was so sincere, the pouting petulance to which it
diminished so like a child's, and the gravity of the offense so novel in
his simple experiences, that Ardmore was bound in chains before her
speech was finished. The little drawl with which she concluded gave
heightened significance to her last three words, so that it seemed that
all the veterans of the war with Mexico trudged by, bearing the flag of
North Carolina and no other banner.
"Governor Osborne is a contemptible ruffian," declared Ardmore with
deep feeling.
Miss Dangerfield nodded judicial approval, and settled back in her chair
the better to contemplate her new secretary, and said:
"I'm a Daughter of the Confederacy and a Colonial Dame. What are you?"
"I suppose you'll never speak to me again; papa sent three expensive
substitutes to the Civil War."
"Three! Horrible!"
"Two of them deserted, and one fell into the Potomac on his way south
and was drowned. I guess they didn't do you folks much harm."
"We'll forgive you that; but what did your ancestors do in the
Revolution?"
"I'm ashamed to say that my great-grandfather was a poor guesser. He
died during Washington's second administration still believing the
Revolution a failure."
"Do you speak of the war of 1861 as the Rebellion or as the war between
the states? I advise you to be careful what you say," and Miss Jerry
Dangerfield was severe.
"I don't believe I ever mentioned it either way, so I'm willing to take
your word for it."
"The second form is correct, Mr. Ardmore. When well-bred Southern
people say Rebellion they refer to the uprising of 1776 against the
British oppressor."
"Good. I'm sure I shall never get them mixed. Now that you are the
governor, what are you going to do first about Appleweight?"
"I've written--that is to say, papa wrote before he went away, a strong
letter to Governor Osborne, complaining that Appleweight was hiding in
South Carolina and running across the state line to rob and murder
people in North Carolina. Papa told Governor Osborne that he must break
up the Appleweight crowd or he would do something about it himself. It's
a splendid letter; you would think that even a coward like Governor
Osborne would do something after getting such a letter."
"Didn't he answer the letter?"
"Answer it? He never got it! Papa didn't send it; that's the reason!
Papa's the kindest man in the world, and he must have been afraid of
hurting Governor Osborne's feelings. He wrote the letter, expecting to
send it, but when he went off to New Orleans he told Mr. Bassford to
hold it till he got back. He had even signed it--you can read it if you
like."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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