The Little Review, June-July 1915 (Vol. 2, No. 4)Various
General
The Little Review, June-July 1915 (Vol. 2, No. 4)
Various
Literature, Modern -- 20th century -- Periodicals
He had liked life with Sasha. He didn’t know until now how much he had
liked it. True, it was a hard life they had lived together. One was on
the go every minute—in bad weather when the frost stung and to walk even
a mile became an agony; and in good weather one was constantly on the
go, when it might perhaps have been pleasant to sit under the trees and
play with the children. But life was good, for all that. Of course, if
they could have saved money—only a little money—it would have been
better. But the little money they could save had had to go for the
taxes. The taxes were for the Fatherland, the priest had told him. The
taxes were paid so that when the need came, Anton would be able to die
for his country. But there was something confusing about that. Life
would be better if it were not for the taxes, and the taxes were paid so
that he might—no, that was bewildering. With the fire in one’s side and
in one’s brain, how could one think clearly about so difficult a matter?
Besides, there were many matters of that sort that he, Anton
Tarasovitch, was not clever enough to think about. One left such things
to the priests, who were good men, and to the clever men at the
universities.
The stars were sometimes a long way off now and sometimes very near to
him. But neither near nor far away did they seem to care about him. They
were the only things he could see in the world and they did not seem to
care about him. Undoubtedly they had seen many men dying. He knew about
the stars! A young teacher who had come to the village when he was a boy
had talked about them and Anton had never forgotten.
The young teacher had not stayed long in the village. He was
“dangerous,” they said, and Anton heard afterwards that he had gone to
America. It gave one many thoughts to listen to the teacher. He had said
that the stars were worlds, just like our own earth—the earth that Anton
knew the good Christ had come down to save. Anton, who was just a boy,
had wanted to ask him if Christ had had to save all these worlds that
were stars. But that was only one of the many confusing thoughts one had
in listening to the young teacher. One felt strange in listening to him,
as if the world weren’t solid at all, but were flowing like a river. * *
*
Anton felt very sorry for himself, lying there under the stars that did
not care for him. He began to cry—silly, weak tears that tasted of salt
as they touched his mouth. It was only at times that he knew that he was
crying. At other times the soul of him entirely left his body and went
shooting up and up, to be recaptured only with a struggle.
The two of them—the burning body and the light soul—would have held
together better, he knew, if someone could grip his hand tightly. At
least that was the way they had done in the fever. When Sasha had
gripped his hand, as if by a miracle he had been restored for a moment
to a complete man, and was no longer two pieces—a body below and a soul
that went fluttering above it.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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