The Captain has ordered the rose-sprinkler turned on and the electric-fans started. ⁂ The dust-fog lifted for a few moments, and the passengers were seen to be leaping overboard. The Bos’un performed yoehoman service in rescuing the imperilled and helping the weak ones back on the Wagon. A collection was taken up to purchase him a silver-plated swinging ice-pitcher. ⁂ 6.45 P. M.—The Mate took soundings, and reported no bottom. The Captain announced that, from the depth of water, we must be nearing Wall Street. The Mate was ordered to ring for a messenger-boy and send him after a pilot. ⁂ 8 P. M.—The Mate boxed the compass and the compass won on points. ⁂ The Committee on Jonah have been through the vessel like a pack of ferrets, and report that the Jonah can be no other than Moxie Matzoon, alias Moxie Grandpa. The report of the Committee was accepted and ordered inscribed on the records. A special copy, engrossed on parchment, will be sent to the Hon. Bromo S. Emerson, of Baltimore. ⁂ Very dull in the smoking-room to-night. Nothing doing but a game of tiddlywinks on the O. P. side. Roderick Dhuar, a reformed Scotch barkeep, enlivened the hours by playing “Comin’ Through the Rye,” with variations, on the cash register. When he finished he found he owed the Steward $22.30. He gave his I O U. ⁂ Shortly after midnight the lookout reported a strange light on the port bow. It turned out to be an electric advertisement, reading, WHEN ALL IN AND SPEECHLESS, MAKE SIGNS FOR BRICKTOP RYE At this touch of the real thing, the Lithia’s passengers perked up considerably, and the yell that greeted the sign sounded like a dog being run over by a Mercedes. +Here endeth the fourth day of the cruise.+ Quoth the Red Raven: “Nevermore!” OMAR ON THE WAGON I. Before the last hour of the Old Year died, Methought a voice without the Tavern cried: “Oh, cut it out, Khayyam; there’s nothing in’t. The Water Wagon waits you. Take a ride!” II. So, with the echoes of the New Year’s chimes The thoughtful Soul upon the Wagon climbs, Cuts out the Grape, and promises to reach The Bosom of his Family betimes. III. At home by six, for Dinner with the Frau; Early to bed and rise; a little Cow And Seltzer when I line up with the Boys: That’s mine. I’m on the Water Wagon now. IV. A Moment’s Halt—a momentary taste Of Water from the Wagon!—Oh, make haste And climb aboard! Aqua is sweeter far Than all the Grape Goods that were ever cased. V. For some we loved, the loveliest and the best, Who tried to beat the Game, are now at rest. They set ’em back, and set ’em back, and then Were gathered to the Kingdom of the Blest. VI. Indeed, indeed, Repentance oft before I swore, and I was honest when I swore. And then the Wagon bumped the Curb, and I Was jolted off into a Liquor Store. VII.