E-text prepared by Al Haines
Transcriber's note:
"Bartimeus" is the pseudonym of Captain Lewis Anselm da Costa
Ritchie, R.N.
THE LONG TRICK
by
"BARTIMEUS"
Author of "A Tall Ship," "Naval Occasions," etc.
"Much of what you have done, as far as the public eye
is concerned, may almost be said to have been done in
the twilight."--_Extract from address delivered by the Prime
Minister on board the Fleet Flagship, Aug._, 1915.
Cassell and Company, Ltd
London, New York, Toronto and Melbourne
First Published. October 1917.
Reprinted (Twice) October 1917, November 1917.
TO
one
CHUNKS
Who, in moments of frenzy, is called
HUNKS
and answers readily to
TUNKS, TINKS or TONKS,
This Book
is
INSCRIBED
FOREWORD
DEAR N AND M,
This is the first opportunity I have had of answering your letter,
although I am hardly to blame since you chose to write anonymously and
leave me with no better clue to your address than the Tunbridge Wells
postmark.
Fee! Fi! Fo! Fum! I am sorry about Torps, though. I admit his
death was a mistake, and I fancy my Publisher thought so too: but we
cannot very well bring him to life again, like Sherlock Holmes. So
please cheer up, and remember that there are just as many fine fellows
in the ink-pot as ever came out of it.
I have borne in mind the final paragraph of your letter, which said,
"We do beseech you not to kill the India-rubber Man." In fact, I
originally meant him to be the hero of this book. But as the book
progressed I found the melancholy conviction growing on me that the
India-rubber Man had become infernally dull. A pair of cynical
bachelors like you will, I know, attribute this to marriage and poor
Betty. For my part I am inclined to put it down to advancing years.
I have just finished the book, and, turning over the pages, found
myself wondering how you will like it. It has been written in so many
different moods and places and noises and temperatures that the general
effect is rather patchwork. But, after all, it was written chiefly for
the amusement of two people, and (as I believe all story-books ought to
be written) out of some curiosity on the Author's part to know "what
happened next."
Thus, you see, I strive to disarm all critics at the outset by the
assumption of an ingenuous indifference to anything they can say. But
there is one portion of the book on which I have expended so much
thought and care that I am willing to defy criticism on the subject. I
refer to the Dedication.
You probably skip Dedications, but they interest me, and I have studied
them a good deal. They are generally arranged in columns like untidy
addition sums, and no two lines are the same length. This is very
important. At the end you arrive, as it were by a series of
stepping-stones, at the climax. And there you are.
No. Let the critics say what they will about the book: but I hold that
the Dedication is It.
Yours sincerely,
"Bartimeus"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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