Autobiographical fiction; England -- Fiction; Marriage -- Fiction; Teachers -- Fiction
A little this side of Madingley, to the left of the road, there is a
secluded dell, paved with grass and planted with fir-trees. It could
not have been worth a visit twenty years ago, for then it was only a
scar of chalk, and it is not worth a visit at the present day, for the
trees have grown too thick and choked it. But when Rickie was up, it
chanced to be the brief season of its romance, a season as brief for a
chalk-pit as a man—its divine interval between the bareness of boyhood
and the stuffiness of age. Rickie had discovered it in his second
term, when the January snows had melted and left fiords and lagoons of
clearest water between the inequalities of the floor. The place looked
as big as Switzerland or Norway—as indeed for the moment it was—and
he came upon it at a time when his life too was beginning to expand.
Accordingly the dell became for him a kind of church—a church where
indeed you could do anything you liked, but where anything you did
would be transfigured. Like the ancient Greeks, he could even laugh at
his holy place and leave it no less holy. He chatted gaily about it,
and about the pleasant thoughts with which it inspired him; he took
his friends there; he even took people whom he did not like. “_Procul
este, profani!_” exclaimed a delighted aesthete on being introduced to
it. But this was never to be the attitude of Rickie. He did not love
the vulgar herd, but he knew that his own vulgarity would be greater if
he forbade it ingress, and that it was not by preciosity that he would
attain to the intimate spirit of the dell. Indeed, if he had agreed
with the aesthete, he would possibly not have introduced him. If the
dell was to bear any inscription, he would have liked it to be “This
way to Heaven,” painted on a sign-post by the high-road, and he did not
realize till later years that the number of visitors would not thereby
have sensibly increased.
On the blessed Monday that the Pembrokes left, he walked out here with
three friends. It was a day when the sky seemed enormous. One cloud, as
large as a continent, was voyaging near the sun, whilst other clouds
seemed anchored to the horizon, too lazy or too happy to move. The sky
itself was of the palest blue, paling to white where it approached the
earth; and the earth, brown, wet, and odorous, was engaged beneath it
on its yearly duty of decay. Rickie was open to the complexities of
autumn; he felt extremely tiny—extremely tiny and extremely important;
and perhaps the combination is as fair as any that exists. He hoped
that all his life he would never be peevish or unkind.
“Elliot is in a dangerous state,” said Ansell. They had reached the
dell, and had stood for some time in silence, each leaning against a
tree. It was too wet to sit down.
“How’s that?” asked Rickie, who had not known he was in any state at
all. He shut up Keats, whom he thought he had been reading, and slipped
him back into his coat-pocket. Scarcely ever was he without a book.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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