The road followed a sharp defile and the sheer depths below invited
him. It would be quite decent of him to free the world of his wretched
self, that had given him no joy and that had become a byword and a
hissing wherever his name was known. He wondered why he had delayed so
long. Life was a prison-house and the labour was hard; below, there
in the snowy ravine, lay peace. He stopped abruptly by a clump of
cedars, clutched them and bent over to scan the depths. He could see
no bottom, and the place was so lone that they might not find him when
it was over. He felt that he had never before been so wholly master
of himself, and the thought steadied him; if he had ever been sane
it was now, when he was about to take French leave of a dreary and
unprofitable world. The moon looked down upon him coldly; the snow-clad
hills were indifferent; the wind lay still, waiting for this life to
slip away like a pebble into the gorge. The place was fitting; he chose
his spot and made ready for the leap.
Steps sounded behind him as of someone walking, but whoever came moved
deliberately along the shoulder of the hill toward the top. There was
no reason for delaying; ample time remained in which to step into the
gorge and be done with it. Wayne clung stubbornly to the slippery edge;
but the moments passed. The tall figure of Stoddard, the priest, drew
nearer, his head bowed and his arms folded under a long cloak. His
shovel hat gave a bizarre note to his costume. He gained the crown of
the ridge and lifted his head.
“Ah, you came out to watch the moon to bed! That, Mr. Craighill, is my
own privilege.”
Wayne stood doggedly by the ravine edge. It was on his lips to berate
the priest for appearing at this crucial moment, and Stoddard’s calm
manner angered him.
“This is the best view possible anywhere about here,” the priest
continued. “You have an eye for landscape, but the wind is rising; let
us walk on into the wood and get away from it.”
“Father Stoddard, you have done me an injury. If I had not heard your
step when I did I should be lying at the bottom of the gap.”
The reaction had been sudden and he was all unstrung. His voice was
strange in his own ears.
“Oh! You had intended doing that? I really can’t believe it.”
“You might as well believe it; it is quite true,” persisted Wayne,
irritably.
“Those things do occur to all of us sometimes,” replied the priest
calmly. “But in your own case it is quite impossible. I advise you to
dismiss the matter from your mind.”
“I tell you I was going to do it; a second more and I should have been
a dead man.”
The priest readjusted his cloak, throwing an end over his shoulder.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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