_W. Green_. At last the dotard's gone! Fly, Lydia, fly, This letter bear to Master Waller straight; Quick, quick, or I'm undone! He is abused, And I must undeceive him--own my love, And heart and hand at his disposal lay. Answer me not, my girl--obey me! Fly. [Goes out.] _Lydia_. Untowardly it falls!--I had resolved This hour to tell her I must quit her service! Go to his house! I will not disobey Her last commands!--I'll leave it at the door, And as it closes on me think I take One more adieu of him! Hard destiny! [Goes out.] SCENE II.--A Room in Sir William's. [Enter CONSTANCE.] _Con_. The booby! He must fall in love, indeed! And now he's naught but sentimental looks And sentences, pronounced 'twixt breath and voice! And attitudes of tender languishment! Nor can I get from him the name of her Hath turned him from a stock into a fool. He hems and haws, now titters, now looks grave! Begins to speak and halts! takes off his eyes To fall in contemplation on a chair, A table, or the ceiling, wall, or floor! I'll plague him worse and worse! O, here he comes! [Enter WILDRAKE.] _Wild_. Despite her spiteful usage I'm resolved To tell her now. Dear neighbour Constance! _Con_. Fool! Accost me like a lady, sir! I hate The name of neighbour! _Wild_. Mistress Constance, then-- I'll call thee that. _Con_. Don't call me anything! I hate to hear thee speak--to look at thee, To dwell in the same house with thee! _Wild_. In what Have I offended? _Con_. What!--I hate an ape! _Wild_. An ape! _Con_. Who bade thee ape the gentleman? And put on dress that don't belong to thee? Go! change thee with thy whipper-in or huntsman, And none will doubt thou wearest thy own clothes. _Wild_. A pretty pass! Mocked for the very dress I bought to pleasure her! Untoward things Are women! [Aside. Walks backwards and forwards.] _Con_. Do you call that walking? Pray What makes you twist your body so, and take Such pains to turn your toes out? If you'd walk, Walk thus! Walk like a man, as I do now! [Walking] Is yours the way a gentleman should walk? You neither walk like man nor gentleman! I'll show you how you walk. [Mimicking him.] Do you call that walking? _Wild_. My thanks, for a drill-sergeant twice a day For her sake! [Aside.] _Con_. Now, of all things in the world, What made you dance last night? _Wild_. What made me dance? _Con_. Right! It was anything but dancing! Steps That never came from dancing-school--nor English, Nor Scotch, nor Irish! You must try to cut, And how you did it! [Cuts.] That's the way to cut! And then your chasse! Thus you went, and thus. [Mimicking him.] As though you had been playing at hop, step, And jump!--and yet you looked so monstrous pleased, And played the simpleton with such a grace, Taking their tittering for compliment! I could have boxed you soundly for't. Ten times Denied I that I knew you.