_Con_. You are not fit to marry. Do not know Enough of the world, sir! Have no more experience, Thought, judgment, than a schoolboy! Have no mind Of your own!--your wife will make a fool of you, Will jilt you, break your heart! I wish she may, I do! You have no more business with a wife Than I have! Do you mean to say, indeed, You are about to marry? _Wild_. Yes, indeed. _Con_. And when? _Wild_. I'll say to-morrow! [Aside.] _Con_. When, I say? _Wild_. To-morrow. _Con_. Thank you: much beholden to you! You've told me on't in time! I'm very much Beholden to you, neighbour Wildrake! And, I pray you, at what hour? _Wild_. That we have left For you to name. _Con_. For me! _Wild_. For you. _Con_. Indeed. You're very bountiful! I should not wonder Meant you I should be bridemaid to the lady? _Wild_. 'Tis just the thing I mean! _Con_. [Furiously.] The thing you mean! Now pray you, neighbour, tell me that again, And think before you speak; for much I doubt You know what you are saying. Do you mean To ask me to be bridemaid? _Wild_. Even so. _Con_. Bridemaid? _Wild_. Ay, bridemaid!--It is coming fast Unto a head. [Aside.] _Con_. And 'tis for me you wait To fix the day? It shall be doomsday, then! _Wild_. Be doomsday? _Con_. Doomsday! _Wild_. Wherefore doomsday? _Con_. Wherefore!--[Boxes him.] Go ask your bride, and give her that from me. Look, neighbour Wildrake! you may think this strange, But don't misconstrue it! For you are vain, sir! And may put down for love what comes from hate. I should not wonder, thought you I was jealous; But I'm not jealous, sir!--would scorn to be so Where it was worth my while--I pray henceforth We may be strangers, sir--you will oblige me By going out of town. I should not like To meet you on the street, sir. Marry, sir! Marry to-day! The sooner, sir, the better! And may you find you have made a bargain, sir. As for the lady!--much I wish her joy. I pray you send me no bridecake, sir! Nor gloves--If you do, I'll give them to my maid! Or throw them into the kennel--or the fire. I am your most obedient servant, sir! [Goes out.] _Wild_. She is a riddle, solve her he who can! [Goes out.] ACT V. SCENE I.--A Room in Sir William Fondlove's. [SIR WILLIAM seated with two Lawyers.] _Sir Wil_. How many words you take to tell few things Again, again say over what, said once, Methinks were told enough! _First Lawyer_. It is the law, Which labours at precision. _Sir Wil_. Yes; and thrives Upon uncertainty--and makes it, too, With all its pains to shun it. I could bind Myself, methinks, with but the twentieth part Of all this cordage, sirs.--But every man, As they say, to his own business. You think The settlement is handsome? _First Lawyer_. Very, sir. _Sir Wil_. Then now, sirs, we have done, and take my thanks, Which, with your charges, I will render you Again to-morrow. _First Lawyer_. Happy nuptials, sir. [Lawyers go out.]