"Nonsense," he said. "Facts are facts. The truth is, Americans habitually act like feeble-minded weaklings in the way they receive criticism. And we radicals share the national infirmity. Let the least suggestion of disapproval be levelled at _Columbia, the gem of the ocean_, and all America foams at the mouth. This is a joke to foreigners; it’s a tragedy to us. I tell you, Pryor, unless Americans learn to stand up to criticism like men and to tolerate dissent as the English, the Germans, and even the French do, they’ll stand where they are—at the tail end of the procession of nations. Don’t you agree with me?" "Lord, yes! Have it your own way. Pull your fellow radicals to pieces if necessary. Treat ’em rough. But don’t slaughter ’em. Remember they’re the only leaven in the slimy dough." "For an avowed conservative, Pryor, that’s going pretty far." "Oh, I’ll go farther than that. I’ll say that if the Confederated Press were to come to grief—which Heaven forbid!—I should have no means of getting at the real news of the world. None whatever. Unless I could sneak into some private whispering gallery in Washington, D.C., or in Wall Street, N.Y." "You perverse standpatter, what do you mean by sticking up for _my_ side? It looks fishy to me. What’s your little game now, I wonder?" "Lloyd, the time has come to give you a straight answer to that question. I’m an agent of the Secret Service; at present, I’m detailed to help the Department of Justice." "The deuce you are!" "My game has been to watch the most dangerous radicals in New York—some five hundred of them—whose names are listed in the department’s books. You are one of the five hundred." "Really! I hope I’ve been a source of ample diversion? As a friend, I’m always glad to oblige." "_Dienst ist dienst_, as the Germans say. While on duty, I had no friends; I merely had five hundred suspects to keep track of. In point of fact, my men have been through your effects several times. We found nothing treasonable, nothing seditious, nothing compromising, except a copy of the Declaration of Independence with the first eight lines underscored. I tried to have your name removed from the black list. But the damaging evidence aforesaid was the ground on which my recommendation was ignored." "Is this a joke?" "No, it’s the gospel truth. But you needn’t feel as though you had been singled out for persecution. Not at all. I’m a marked man as much as you. If the Intelligence Service of the Government detects an atom of intelligence in one of its agents, it makes it a special point always to ignore that agent’s recommendations. Never mind. I wrote out my resignation this morning. Here it is. It goes to Washington at once." "Surely, Pryor, you have other reasons for resigning the job?"