“Heaven forgive me for having so base a thought!” he cried. “Heaven
forgive me for being so base as to class the one whom I love with such
creatures as his patron orders his chaplain to marry! She is a good
and innocent child, and if she will come to me I shall feel honoured. I
shall prove to all the world that a woman, though lowly-born, may yet be
a true helpmeet for such as I. She will aid me in my labours, not impede
them. I know now that I love her. I know now that she will be a blessing
to me. I love her, and I pray that I may ever love her truly and
honestly.”
It was characteristic of the man that the very thought of opposition
should strengthen him. An hour earlier he had been unable to assure
himself that his feeling for her was love, but now he felt assured on
this point: he loved her, and he had never before loved a woman. She was
the first fruit of his mission to Cornwall. She had professed the
faith to which even he himself had failed to attain until he had been
preaching for years. Bound to her by a tie that was the most sacred that
could exist between a man and a woman, his most earnest hope was to hold
her to him by another bond whose strands were interwoven with a sympathy
that was human as well as divine. His mind was made up at last.
He was early at breakfast with his host, but he did not now think it
necessary to ask Mr. Hartwell what he had meant by his reference to the
absurdity of John Bennet's jealousy. The morning gave promise of a day
of brilliant sunshine and warmth. There was nothing sinister in the
aspect of the sun, such as had been noted on the previous day.
“Ah, sir,” said Hartwell, “you came hither with a blessing to us all,
and you will leave with a sense of having accomplished by the exercise
of your own judgment far more than we looked for at such a time. The
boats have put out to the fishing ground once more, and the dread that
seemed overhanging our poor friends sank with the setting sun last
evening.”
“Not to me be the praise--not to me,” said Wesley, bowing his head in
all humility. After a few moments he raised his head quite suddenly,
saying:
“You have referred to my judgment, dear friend; I wonder if you think
that in many matters my judgment is worthy to be depended on?”
“Indeed, sir, I know of no man in the world whose judgment in all
reasonable matters I would accept sooner than yours,” replied Hartwell.
“Why, Mr. Wesley, who save you would have foreseen a way of avoiding the
trouble which threatened us by such means as you adopted? Were not
we all looking for you to administer a rebuke to the man whose vanity
carried him so far away from what we held to be discreet? Was there
one of us who foresaw that the right way of treating him was to let him
alone?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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