The Magistrate: A Farce in Three Acts — John Shaqi
The Magistrate: A Farce in Three ActsPinero, Arthur Wing
General
The Magistrate: A Farce in Three Acts
Pinero, Arthur Wing
Comedy plays; English drama -- 19th century
Of course, of course, of course.
LUGG.
[_To himself._] Fancy him being jealous of Mr. Wormington, now. Very
good, sir--what price, sir?
MR. POSKET.
The best. [_To himself._] There now, I've no money. [_Seeing the
packet on table._] Oh, pay for it with this, Lugg.
LUGG.
Yes, sir.
MR. POSKET.
And keep the change for your trouble.
LUGG.
Thank you, sir; thank you, sir--very much obliged to you, sir. [_To
himself._] That's like a liberal gentleman.
[_LUGG goes out as MR. WORMINGTON enters through the curtains with the
charge sheet in his hand. MR. WORMINGTON, on seeing MR. POSKET,
uneasily tucks his pocket-handkerchief in his collar so as to hide his
necktie._
MR. WORMINGTON.
H'm! Good morning.
MR. POSKET.
Good morning, Wormington.
MR. WORMINGTON.
The charge sheet.
MR. POSKET.
Sit down.
[_MR. WORMINGTON puts on his spectacles; MR. POSKET also attempts to
put on his spectacles, but hurts the bridge of his nose, winces, and
desists._
MR. POSKET.
[_To himself._] My nose is extremely painful. [_To MR. WORMINGTON._]
You have a bad cold I am afraid, Wormington--bronchial?
MR. WORMINGTON.
Ahem! Well--ah--the fact is--you may have noticed how very chilly the
nights are.
MR. POSKET.
Very, very.
MR. WORMINGTON.
The only way to maintain the circulation is to run as fast as one can.
MR. POSKET.
To run--as fast as one can--yes--quite so.
MR. WORMINGTON.
[_To himself, looking at MR. POSKET'S shirt front._] How very
extraordinary--he is wearing no cravat whatever!
MR. POSKET.
[_Buttoning up his coat to avoid MR. WORMINGTON'S gaze._] Anything
important this morning?
MR. WORMINGTON.
Nothing particular after the first charge, a serious business arising
out of the raid on the "Hotel des Princes."
MR. POSKET.
[_Starting._] "Hotel des Princes?"
MR. WORMINGTON.
Inspector Messiter found six persons supping there at one o'clock this
morning. Two contrived to escape.
MR. POSKET.
Dear me--I am surprised--I mean, did they?
MR. WORMINGTON.
But they left their overcoats behind them, and it is believed they
will be traced.
MR. POSKET.
Oh, do you--do you think it is worth while? The police have a great
deal to occupy them just now.
MR. WORMINGTON.
But surely if the police see their way to capture anybody we had
better raise no obstacle.
MR. POSKET.
No--no--quite so--never struck me.
MR. WORMINGTON.
[_Referring to charge sheet._] The remaining four it was found
necessary to take into custody.
MR. POSKET.
Good gracious! What a good job the other two didn't wait. I beg your
pardon--I mean--you say we have four?
MR. WORMINGTON.
Yes, on the charge of obstructing the police. The first assault
occurred in the supper-room--the second in the four-wheeled cab on the
way to the station. There were five persons in the cab at the
time--the two women, the two men, and the Inspector.
MR. POSKET.
Dear me, it must have been a very complicated assault. Who are the
unfortunate people?
MR. WORMINGTON.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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