The Man Upstairs and Other StoriesWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
General
The Man Upstairs and Other Stories
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Humorous stories, English
He dressed with more than usual care that night. Your wise general
never throws away a move. He was particular about his tie. As a rule,
Wilson selected one for him. But there had been times when Wilson had
made mistakes. One could not rely absolutely on Wilson's taste in ties.
He did not blame him. Better men than Wilson had gone wrong over an
evening tie. But tonight there must be no taking of chances.
'Where do we keep our ties, Wilson?' he asked.
'The closet to the right of the door, sir. The first twelve shallow
shelves, counting from the top, sir. They contain a fair selection of
our various cravats. Replicas in bulk are to be found in the third nest
of drawers in your dressing-room, sir.'
'I only want one, my good man. I'm not a regiment. Ah! I stake all on
this one. Not a word, Wilson. No discussion. This is the tie I wear.
What's the time?'
'Eight minutes to eleven, sir.'
'I must be off. I shall be late. I shan't want you any more tonight.
Don't wait for me.'
'Very good, sir.'
Rollo left the room, pale but determined, and hailed a taxi.
* * * * *
It is a pleasant spot, the vestibule of the Carlton Hotel.
Glare--glitter--distant music--fair women--brave men. But one can have
too much of it, and as the moments pass, and she does not arrive, a
chill seems to creep into the atmosphere. We wait on, hoping against
hope, and at last, just as waiters and commissionaires are beginning to
eye us with suspicion, we face the truth. She is not coming. Then out we
crawl into cold, callous Pall Mall, and so home. You have been through
it, dear reader, and so have I.
And so, at eleven forty-five that evening, had Rollo. For a full
three-quarters of an hour he waited, scanning the face of each new
arrival with the anxious scrutiny of a lost dog seeking its master; but
at fourteen minutes to twelve the last faint flicker of hope had died
away. A girl may be a quarter of an hour late for supper. She may be
half an hour late. But there is a limit, and to Rollo's mind forty-five
minutes passed it. At ten minutes to twelve a uniformed official
outside the Carlton signalled to a taxi-cab, and there entered it a
young man whose faith in Woman was dead.
Rollo meditated bitterly as he drove home. It was not so much the fact
that she had not come that stirred him. Many things may keep a girl
from supper. It was the calm way in which she had ignored the
invitation. When you send a girl three bouquets, a bracelet, and a gold
Billiken with ruby eyes, you do not expect an entire absence of
recognition. Even a penny-in-the-slot machine treats you better than
that. It may give you hairpins when you want matches but at least it
takes some notice of you.
He was still deep in gloomy thought when he inserted his latchkey and
opened the door of his flat.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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