The Mania of the Nations on the Planet Mars and its Terrific Consequences: A Combination of Fun and WisdomCalisch, James Howard
Science
The Mania of the Nations on the Planet Mars and its Terrific Consequences: A Combination of Fun and Wisdom
Calisch, James Howard
World War, 1914-1918 -- Miscellanea
Now the Servers were one of a group of small nations, heretofore
referred to as the Bally-Khan States, and they had a powerful friend
and protector in the politically far more important nation of the
RUSH-NOTS. The Rush-Nots were named for the slowness of their national
progress. For many centuries there had been among the Nazarrano nations
a pronounced prejudice against the Heebrons, notwithstanding the fact
that NAZARRO Himself had been a Heebron and had followed the Heebron
faith. Heebrons were unscrupulously persecuted, robbed, tortured,
murdered, their possessions frequently confiscated, and they were
permitted to dwell only in special sections set aside for them. These
criminal proceedings had long ago been abolished in all the other
Nazarrano countries, but the Rush-Nots continued to indulge in these
sordid amusements of the long-forgotten past. In all other Nazarrano
countries, moreover, the power of the ruler had been limited by giving
his subjects a share in determining the laws that govern them. Among
the Rush-Nots the ruler still had absolute power over his subjects
as the rulers in other countries had had in the long-forgotten past.
So you can easily understand that in matters of progress and social
improvement they rushed not. Nevertheless, by means of bloodshed, the
Rush-Nots had acquired a goodly proportion of the crust of Mars. So
the Rush-Nots, being friends of the Bally-Khan nations to which group
the Servers belonged, parleyed with the Austrich-ans and told them
to treat the Servers more politely, and threatened that otherwise
they would be compelled to direct their engines of destruction very
impolitely against the Austrich-ans.
We have stated before that Brittia was desirous of permanent peace. So,
indeed, were the Rush-Nots, because they, too, had obtained more than
their due proportion of Martian territory. So, too, were the previously
mentioned Frank-Aulians or Fringe, who in fact had entered into an
intimate bond of friendship with the Rush-Nots. The Brits therefore, to
all appearances, did their best by means of dip-low-macy to avoid the
threatening war. But the Austrich-ans hurriedly commenced to make war
preparations; and when the Rush-Nots saw this, they followed suit.
Whether or not the Austrich-ans had acted all this time with
the secret approval of the great WILMOSTASH, or the Two-Ton
explosive-manufacturers, may forever be a question fit for debate.
Yet so much is certain that, at this momentous stage of the
international quarrel, WILMOSTASH peremptorily told the Rush-Nots to
turn their destructive apparatus back from the Austrich-an borders,
so that Austricha might do to the Servers whatever served the
Austrich-an-Two-Tonian interests best. The Rush-Nots told the mighty
WILMOSTASH to go to Halifax, a sort of meeting-place where it is
always hot to suffocation.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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