The Mania of the Nations on the Planet Mars and its Terrific Consequences: A Combination of Fun and WisdomCalisch, James Howard
Science
The Mania of the Nations on the Planet Mars and its Terrific Consequences: A Combination of Fun and Wisdom
Calisch, James Howard
World War, 1914-1918 -- Miscellanea
Under these circumstances, the unprejudiced observer would naturally
expect the nations to form some sort of an alliance or federation
for mutual protection, and with a view to a sensible combination of
interests. Yet so short-sighted have been the evidently narrow-minded
Martians until now, that they have utterly failed to take any such
step. Nay, instead of cooperating with each other, the nations
actually antagonize one another with blind stupidity. Small-minded
jealousies and hatreds, expressing themselves especially in a peculiar
international science which the Martians call dip-low-macy, keep the
nations aloof from one another, and make sworn hereditary enemies of
nations that should entertain naught but friendly and cooperative
relations. Even those nations which have acquired the same faith, the
same hopes, the same aspirations, continue to lead their isolated
national existence, carefully nursing their mutual petty hatreds
and malice against other nationalities. Inasmuch as pretty nearly
all the Martian nations seem to be afflicted with this malicious
nationality-mania, the planet Mars, as seen from the earth, inevitably
makes the impression of one vast lunatic asylum, nationality-mania
being the dreadful malady from which the Mars-bound patients are
unfortunately suffering. Their minds seem to be as much in a whirl as
is the rolling planet which they inhabit.
This most unfortunate mental disease even disrupts and destroys the
much vaunted bonds of a common religious faith.
On the planet Mars, aside from the Nazarranos, another religious
sect flourishes, founded by a prophet whose name, as far as we could
decipher, was MOE HAMID. This MOE HAMID strictly prohibited the
use of the mussel as an article of nourishment. And by the law of
contradiction or by the irony of fate, the sect has ever since been
known as the Musselmen. Now these Musselmen, although dispersed among
different nationalities, have really formed a sort of brotherhood
founded on their faith. Whenever a holy war is declared in earnest, all
Musselmen stand together. That the members of this sect should refer
to the Nazarrano-Darvinianos as dogs, may be deplorably one-sided,
but can readily be understood. At any rate the Musselmen are known to
stick together. Among the Darvinized Nazarranos, however, cooperative
brotherhood is totally lacking. One of the Nazarrano-Darviniano nations
looks upon another such nation as a contemptible pack of dogs; one
nation considers the other to be an aggregate of low barbarians; and
every single nation among them envies all the others any political
power or industrial prosperity which by long-continued effort they may
have attained.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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