Reluctantly Sylviana had admitted that this behavior, either in killing
or being killed, was in no way exceptional among sharks. And far from
being the archetype of its race, this relatively small and undeveloped
creature could not begin to match the rakish refinements of the Blue,
the Tiger, and the ineffable Great White. That they preferred to feed
upon the dead and dying, that they usually left substantial, uninjured
creatures alone, was robbed of all comforting assurance by the fact that
their perceptions were so dim, their mental development so limited, that
the actions of a given individual in a given situation could in no way
be safely predicted. Like life itself, there was just no telling. From
this experience these thriving, thoughtless killers became for him the
very symbol of the dark, violent side of nature that had always so
terrified and appalled him.
'There must be something more to life,' he said, on the thirteenth
night since their arrival. They sat before a driftwood fire in the
sand, protected from the wind by the high north wall, a short distance
from their cave. With the stars above and the soft murmur of the waves
before them, there was peace and sadness enough in his heart to speak of
it, and to admit the vague emptiness he found so hard and painful to
express. For he knew that she felt an emptiness, too.
'All the birth and dying,' he continued, 'The endless struggle
just to survive, and to create new beings to struggle and die when you
are gone. It is very hard for me to say this, Sylviana, but there are
times when I think Nature is very cruel, and I can see no wisdom in
living only by her laws.'
'But aren't you the one who's always saying that the societies
of men must have failed because they had forgotten the simple goodness
of Nature, primal virtue' and all of that? That society had
overridden the subtle ways of the Tao, creating its own, alternative
order in which Man's will alone was powerful? That there were no
natural, softening influences to prevent man's ignorance and
violence?' Her words seemed mockery, but there was a reason for them.
She was trying to draw him to the heart of the matter, which could be
difficult when he became thoughtful and began to withdraw.
'You know I've said these things, and you know I still believe
them. But why couldn't men do both: raise themselves above the
endless struggle, and still have the thought and compassion to put away
war and racial hatred, to feed and clothe and give medicine to those who
need it? Why does it have to be one or the other?' There was no
answer to such a question. Impatiently, she stirred the fire with a
stick.
'Aren't you really trying to tell me that you've decided to
visit the island at all costs, and that you're afraid of what you
might find there?'
'Yes,' he replied dourly, confused.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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