For several seconds neither spoke. Eve, shutting out all other thoughts,
sat close to Loder, clinging tenaciously to the momentary comforting
sense of protection; Loder, striving to marshal his ideas, hesitated
before the ordeal of speech. At last, realizing his responsibility, he
turned to her slowly.
“Eve,” he said, in a low voice and with some hesitation, “I want you
to know that in all this--from the moment I saw him--from the moment I
understood--I have had you in my thoughts--you and no one else.”
She raised her eyes to his face.
“Do you realize--?” he began afresh. “Do you know what this--this thing
means?”
Still she remained silent.
“It means that after to-night there will be no such person in London as
John Loder. To-morrow the man who was known by that name will be
found in his rooms; his body will be removed, and at the post-modern
examination it will be stated that he died of an overdose of morphia.
His charwoman will identify him as a solitary man who lived respectably
for years and then suddenly went down-hill with remarkable speed. It
will be quite a common case. Nothing of interest will be found in his
rooms; no relation will claim his body; after the usual time he will
be given the usual burial of his class. These details are horrible; but
there are times when we must look at the horrible side of life--because
life is incomplete without it.
“These things I speak of are the things that will meet the casual eye;
but in our sight they will have a very different meaning.
“Eve,” he said, more vehemently, “a whole chapter in my life has been
closed to-night, and my first instinct is to shut the book and throw it
away. But I'm thinking of you. Remember, I'm thinking of you! Whatever
the trial, whatever the difficulty, no harm shall come to you. You have
my word for that!
“I'll return with you now to Grosvenor Square; I'll remain there till a
reasonable excuse can be given for Chilcote's going abroad; I will
avoid Fraide, I will cut politics--whatever the cost; then, at the first
reasonable moment, I will do what I would do now, to-night if it were
possible. I'll go away, start afresh; do in another country what I have
done in this.”
There was a long silence; then Eve turned to him. The apathy of a
moment before had left her face. “In another country?” she repeated. “In
another country?”
“Yes; a fresh career in a fresh country. Something clean to offer you.
I'm not too old to do what other men have done.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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