The Memoirs of Mr. Charles J. YellowplushThackeray, William Makepeace
General
The Memoirs of Mr. Charles J. Yellowplush
Thackeray, William Makepeace
Didactic fiction; England -- Fiction; Household employees -- Fiction; Humorous stories; Master and servant -- Fiction
Mr. Altamont came out presently, Miss Mary under his arm, and Miss
Betsy following behind, rayther sulky. “This way, sir,” cries I, pushin
forward; and I threw a great cloak over Miss Betsy, fit to smother her.
Mr. A. and Miss Mary skipped on and was out of sight when Miss Betsy's
cloak was settled, you may be sure.
“They're only gone to the fly, miss. It's a little way up the street,
away from the crowd of carridges.” And off we turned TO THE RIGHT, and
no mistake.
After marchin a little through the plash and mud, “Has anybody seen
Coxy's fly?” cries I, with the most innocent haxent in the world.
“Cox's fly!” hollows out one chap. “Is it the vaggin you want?” says
another. “I see the blackin wan pass,” giggles out another gentlmn; and
there was such a hinterchange of compliments as you never heerd. I pass
them over though, because some of 'em were not wery genteel.
“Law, miss,” said I, “what shall I do? My master will never forgive me;
and I haven't a single sixpence to pay a coach.” Miss Betsy was just
going to call one when I said that; but the coachman wouldn't have it at
that price, he said, and I knew very well that SHE hadn't four or five
shillings to pay for a wehicle. So, in the midst of that tarin rain,
at midnight, we had to walk four miles, from Westminster Bridge to
Pentonwille; and what was wuss, I DIDN'T HAPPEN TO KNOW THE WAY. A very
nice walk it was, and no mistake.
At about half-past two, we got safe to John Street. My master was at the
garden gate. Miss Mary flew into Miss Betsy's arms, while master begun
cussin and swearing at me for disobeying his orders, and TURNING TO THE
RIGHT INSTEAD OF TO THE LEFT! Law bless me! his hacting of hanger was
very near as natral and as terrybl as Mr. Cartlich's in the play.
They had waited half an hour, he said, in the fly, in the little street
at the left of the theater; they had drove up and down in the greatest
fright possible; and at last came home, thinking it was in vain to wait
any more. They gave her 'ot rum-and-water and roast oysters for supper,
and this consoled her a little.
I hope nobody will cast an imputation on Miss Mary for HER share in this
adventer, for she was as honest a gal as ever lived, and I do believe is
hignorant to this day of our little strattygim. Besides, all's fair in
love; and, as my master could never get to see her alone, on account
of her infernal eleven sisters and ma, he took this opportunity of
expressin his attachment to her.
If he was in love with her before, you may be sure she paid it him back
again now. Ever after the night at Ashley's, they were as tender as two
tuttle-doves--which fully accounts for the axdent what happened to me,
in being kicked out of the room: and in course I bore no mallis.
I don't know whether Miss Betsy still fancied that my master was in love
with her, but she loved muffings and tea, and kem down to his parlor as
much as ever.
Now comes the sing'lar part of my history.
CHAPTER II.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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