The peacefulness of his sleeping face made a deep impression upon me.
Though I knew that with his waking the old look would come back, it was
an indescribable pleasure to me to see him, if but for an instant, free
from that shadowy something which dropped a vail of mistrust between
us. It seemed to show me that evil was not innate in this man, and
explained, if it did not justify, the weakness which had made me more
lenient to what was doubtful in his appearance and character than I had
been to that of his equally courteous but less attractive brother.
The glances I allowed myself to cast in his direction were fleeting
enough, however. Even if womanly delicacy had not forbidden me to look
too often and too long that way, the sense of the unfair advantage I
was possibly taking of his weakness made the possibility of
encountering his waking eye a matter of some apprehension. I knew that
honor demanded I should rouse him, that he would not thank me for
letting him sleep after his brother had left the room; and yet, whether
from too much heart--he was in such sore need of rest--or from too
little conscience--I was in such sore need of knowledge--I let him
slumber on, and never made so much as a move after my first startled
discovery of his condition.
And so five minutes, ten minutes, went by, and, imperceptibly to
myself, the softening influence which his sleeping countenance exerted
upon me deepened and strengthened till I began to ask if I had not
given too much scope to my imagination since I had been in this house,
and foolishly attributed a meaning to expressions and events that in my
calmer moments would show themselves to possess no special significance.
The probability was that I had, and once allowing myself to admit this
idea, it is astonishing how rapidly it gained possession of my
judgment, altering the whole tenor of my thoughts, and if not exactly
transforming the situation into one of cheerfulness and ease, at least
robbing it of much of that sepulchral character which had hitherto made
it so nearly unbearable to me. The surroundings, too, seemed to partake
of the new spirit of life which had seized me. The room looked less
shadowy, and lost some of that element of mystery which had made its
dimly seen corners the possible abode of supernatural visitants. Even
the clock ticked less lugubriously, and that expressionless face on the
pillow--
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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