[_Laying down his plan and cards and producing a letter from his breast-pocket._] By-the-bye, the fair Lily-- the heroine of the party, as you call her-- is in a pretty tantrum over the whole business. ROPER. Tantrum? COOLING. [_Unfolding the letter._] Had this from her ten minutes ago. Listen to _this_. [_Reading._] "My Dressing-room. 11-15. 80 degrees, with the windows open." [_In an injured tone._] Haw, so I should think! ROPER. [_Concerned._] What's amiss? COOLING. [_Reading._] "Morrie, you pig." [_ROPER whistles._] "Morrie, you pig. I should feel deeply indebted to you if you would kindly inform me why the devil you went out of your way to deceive me last night. You led me to suppose-- and so did that lying worm Lal Roper----" [_looking at ROPER_] _You._ ROPER. Oh, lord! COOLING. [_Resuming._] "--that lying worm Lal Roper----" ROPER. [_Testily._] All right, all right. COOLING. "--you both led me to suppose that this rotten banquet was to be a family gathering of the ladies and gentlemen of the Pandora Theatre, and no outsiders asked. Now I find that only three or four of the men of the Company are invited, and I hear from Nita Trevenna, who has got it from young Kennedy, that several of the Boys are to be laid on for the occasion. The result is you have made me tell a regular whopper to a particular friend of mine with regard to this affair----" ROPER. [_Passing his hand over his brow._] Nicko Jeyes. COOLING. "--which I will never forgive you for, Morris Cooling-- neither you nor Lal Roper. As true as I am alive, I have a jolly good mind not to show, but to put on my old rags and go straight home. You are two cads. So take it out of that and believe me, Always yours affectionately, Lil." ROPER. [_Walking about._] Well, I'm blessed! COOLING. [_Returning the letter to his pocket._] Haw! Tasty document! ROPER. Lying worm and a cad! And from Miss Lily Margaret Upjohn! [_To COOLING._] Done anything about it? COOLING. No; waited for you. [_Going on with his arrangements at the tables._] _You're_ responsible. What _I_ did last night was simply to oblige a pal. ROPER. [_Irresolutely._] I'd better run round to her, and try to smooth her down, hadn't I? COOLING. Perhaps you _had_. [_Placing a card._] Mr. Stewart Heneage. [_To ROPER._] Why you wanted to mislead the girl I can't understand. ROPER. Damn it, you agreed that that sulky brute Jeyes 'ud be a wet blanket! You blow hot and cold, you do! COOLING. There you go! More filthy temper! ROPER. If ever I assist in getting up another party----! [_As he reaches the door on the left, he encounters CARLTON SMYTHE, who is entering at that moment, and puts on his humourous manner._] Hul-lo! Here we are again! All change for Oxford Circus! SMYTHE. [_A bulky, sleepy-looking man with grey hair, a darker moustache and beard, and a heavy, rolling gait._] Ha, Lal! ROPER. I'm just going to have a word with Lil Parradell. [_He disappears and SMYTHE advances._