The Minister's Charge; Or, The Apprenticeship of Lemuel BarkerHowells, William Dean
General
The Minister's Charge; Or, The Apprenticeship of Lemuel Barker
Howells, William Dean
Boston (Mass.) -- Fiction; Clergy -- Fiction; Poets -- Fiction
“I tell you, Boston's full of 'em,” he said excitedly. “One of 'em come
up to me just now, and says he, 'Seems to me I've seen you before, but
I can't place you.' 'Oh yes,' says I, 'I'll tell you where it was. I
happened to be in the police court one morning when they was sendin'
you up for three months.' I tell you he got round the corner! Might 'a'
played checkers on his coat tail. Why, what do you suppose would
been the next thing if I hadn't have let him know I saw through him?”
demanded the young man of Barker, who listened to this adventure
with imperfect intelligence. “He'd 'a' said, 'Hain't I seen you down
Kennebunk way som'eres?' And when I said, 'No, I'm from Leominster!'
or where-ever I was from if I was green, he'd say, 'Oh yes, so it _was_
Leominster. How's the folks?' and he'd try to get me to think that _he_
was from Leominster too; and then he'd want me to go off and see the
sights with him; and pretty soon he'd meet a feller that 'ud dun him for
that money he owed him; and he'd say he hadn't got anything with him but
a cheque for forty dollars; and the other feller'd say he'd got to have
his money, and he'd kind of insinuate it was all a put-up job about the
cheque for forty dollars, anyway; and that 'ud make the first feller
mad, and he'd take out the check, and ask him what he thought o' that;
and the other feller'd say, well, it was a good cheque, but it wan't
money, and he wanted money; and then the first feller'd say, 'Well, come
along to the bank and get your money,' and the other'd say the bank was
shut. 'Well, then,' the first feller'd say, 'well, sir, I ain't a-goin'
to ask any favour of _you_. How much _is_ your bill?' and the other
feller'd say ten dollars, or fifteen, or may be twenty-five, if they
thought I had that much, and the first feller'd say, 'Well, here's a
gentleman from up my way, and I guess he'll advance me that much on my
cheque if I make it worth his while. He knows me.' And the first thing
you know--he's been treatin' you, and so polite, showin' you round, and
ast you to go to the theayter--you advance the money, and you keep on
with the first feller, and pretty soon he asks you to hold up a minute,
he wants to go back and get a cigar; and he goes round the corner, and
you hold up, and _hold_ up, and in about a half an hour, or may be less
time, you begin to smell a rat, and you go for a policeman, and the next
morning you find your name in the papers, 'One more unfortunate!' You
look out for 'em, young feller! Wish I _had_ let that one go on till
he done something so I could handed him over to the cops. It's a shame
they're allowed to go 'round, when the cops knows 'em. Hello! There
_comes_ my mate, _now_.” The young man spoke as if they had been talking
of his mate and expecting him, and another young man, his counterpart
in dress, but of a sullen and heavy demeanour very unlike his own brisk
excitement, approached, flapping a bank-note in his hand. “I just been
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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