Chinese -- England -- Fiction; England -- Fiction; Epistolary fiction; Humorous stories
Although I had admittedly hoped that these persons would not conceal
themselves behind the wings of epigram or intangible prevarication, I
was far from being prepared for the candour with which they greeted me,
and although by long usage I am reasonably unconcerned at the proximity
of any of our own recognised genii, it is not to be denied that my
organs of ferocity grew small and unstable at the revelations.
From their words it appeared that the spot on which we stood had
long been the recognised centre and meeting-place for every class of
abandoned and objectionable spirit of the universe. Not only this, but
several of the persons who had gathered around were confidently pointed
out as the earthly embodiment of various diabolical Forces, while others
cheerfully admitted that they themselves were the shadows of certain
illustrious ones who had long Passed Above, and all united in declaring
that those who moved among them wearing the distinction of a dark blue
uniform were Evil Beings of a most ghoulish and repulsive type. Indeed,
as I looked more closely, I could see that not only those pointed out,
but all standing around, had expressions immeasurably more in
keeping with a band of outcast spirits than suggestive of an assembly
representing wisdom and dignified ease. At that moment, however, a most
inelegant movement was caused by one suddenly declaring that he
had recognised this one who is inscribing his experiences to be the
apparition of a certain great reformer who during the period of his
ordinary existence had received the name of Guy Fawkes, and amid a
tumult of overwhelming acclamation a proposal was raised that I
should be carried around in triumph and afterwards initiated into
the observance of a time-honoured custom. Although it had now become
doubtful to what end the adventure was really tending, this person
would have submitted himself agreeably to the participation had not the
blue-apparelled band cleft their way into the throng just as I was about
to be borne off in triumph, and forming themselves into a ringed
barrier around me they presently succeeded in rearranging the contending
elements and in restoring me to the society of my friends. To these
persons they complained with somewhat unreasoning acrimony that I
had been exciting the inmates into a state of rebellion with wild
imaginings, and for the first time I then began to understand that an
important error had been perpetrated by some one, and that instead of
being a meeting-place for those upholding the wisdom and authority
of the country, the building was in reality an establishment for the
mentally defective and those of treacherous instincts.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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