_Char._ There needs no explanation of my conduct--call it caprice--say, if you please, that _I_ am _altered_--say _I have changed my mind_, and love another better-- _Helen._ Indeed! and is it come to this! he shall not see he mortifies me, however--(_aside_) Since you are in this mind, sir, I wish you had been pleased to signify the same by letter, sir-- _Char._ By letter? _Helen._ Yes, sir,--for this personal visit being rather unexpected, does not promise to be particularly pleasant-- _Char._ I believe so, madam--you did not calculate, I fancy, on this _sudden_ return. _Helen._ No, indeed, sir--and should have shown all Christian patience if this _sudden_ return hadn't happened these _twelve months_. _Char._ The devil you would! madam!--but I'll be cool--I'll cut her to the heart with a razor of ice--I'll congeal her with indifference--you must know, madam-- _Helen._ Bless me, Charles, how very strangely you look--you're pale and red, and red and pale, in the same moment! why you can scarcely breathe! and now you tremble so! I'm afraid you are very ill. _Char._ Sarcastic! _Helen._ You move all over like a ship in a storm! _Char._ Vastly well, madam--and now-- _Helen._ Your teeth chatter!-- _Char._ Fire and fagots, madam, I _will_ speak! _Helen._ Do, dear Charles, while your are able--your voice will be gone in a minute or two, and then-- _Char._ I will be heard! (_bawling_) _Helen._ That you will, indeed, and all over the house, too. _Char._ Madam, will you hear me or not? _Helen._ I am glad to find there's no affection of the lungs! _Char._ Death and torments! may I be allowed to speak--yes, or no? _Helen._ Yes, but gently; and make haste before they call the watch. _Char._ Madam, madam--I wish to keep my temper--I wish to be cool. _Helen._ Perhaps this will answer the purpose (_Fanning him_). _Char._ (_In confusion, after a pause, aside_) Is she laughing at me now, or trying to wheedle me into a good humour? I feel, Miss Worret, that I am expressing myself with too much warmth--I must therefore inform you, that being ordered home with despatches, and having some leisure time on my hands on my return, I thought it but proper as I passed the house to call at your door--just to say--a--a--just civilly to say--false! cruel! perfidious girl! you may break the tough heart of a sailor, but damn me if he will ever own it broke for love of you! _Helen._ On my honour, sir, I do not understand what all this means. _Char._ You don't? _Helen._ No, sir--if your purpose here is insult, you might, methinks, have found some fitter object than one who has so limited a power to resent it! [_Going._ _Char._ Stay, madam, stay--what a face is there! a smile upon it too: oh, Helen, spare those smiles! they once could wake my soul to ecstasy! but now they rouse it into madness: save them, madam, for a happier lover--save them for lord Austencourt. _Helen._ Charles, Charles, you have been deceived: but come, sit down and hear me.