A few years ago, two travelling passenger agents, whose lines supplement
one another to make a through route across the continent, went down into
an Eastern manufacturing city to land business bound west to a national
convention of one of the biggest of the fraternal orders. There were other
passenger men heading toward that same territory, and the two men from the
connecting lines made an offensive and defensive alliance. When they
reached this town, they found that the chief officers of the local lodge
were two city detectives and a police justice. All three of the city
officers showed little enthusiasm about the coming convention. The
passenger men took off their coats--figuratively--and pitched in.
For three days, they ran up an expense account that must have all but
paralyzed the auditors of their companies, but they accomplished results.
After the first day of entertainment, the police justice said that there
would be an even dozen of them for the three-thousand-mile run, which was
going some. Most passenger men would have rested content on those laurels,
but this combination used that first day only to whet their appetites.
They started briskly out on the second, a little fagged, but still in
fighting trim, and by that night the two detectives united in promising
one or two filled Pullmans. The third day saw the two traffic solicitors
nearly dead, and the well-seasoned city officials just in fine trim. The
trim must have been fine, for that night they completed arrangements for
one of the biggest special train movements of that year: two hundred and
fifty enthusiastic brethren went three-quarters of the way across the
continent and back as a result of the work of these passenger men.
Once a travelling passenger agent went nearly too far in this
entertainment business. He got business, miles and miles and miles of it,
but he also got drinking far too heavily. One day, when he came into the
general offices very much the worse for entertaining, he bumped into no
less a man than the president of the road. That president was a strict old
soul. He had church connections, and he used to lecture his Sunday School
class on the evils of the liquor habit. He decided to make an example of
this young whelp of a passenger agent from off the road.
But just as the sentence was about to be pronounced, the general passenger
agent interfered. He went straight to the president and the wrath of an
honest man was in his eye.
"We don't intend to have drunken men working here," the president kept
saying. "It's the example--"
"If he drinks," said the G. P. A., "it's my fault, and I'm the man to let
go."
The president let his eyeglasses drop in astonishment.
"You?" he said.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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