English poetry -- 19th century; Great Britain -- Colonies -- Africa -- Poetry; Humorous poetry, English
[Illustration ** An African showing Blood’s shirt to the other two
travellers.]
With barbarism past belief
They flaunted in our faces
The relics of our noble chief;
With insolent grimaces,
Raised the historic shirt before
Our eyes, and pointed on the floor
To dog-eared cards and loaded dice;
It seems they sold him by the slice.
Well, every man has got his price.
The horrors followed thick and fast,
I turned my head to give a last
Farewell to Sin; but, ah! too late,
I only saw his horrid fate--
Some savages around a pot
That seemed uncomfortably hot;
And in the centre of the group
My dear companion making soup.
[Illustration ** Cooking cauldron in the midst of a group of
Africans with Sin’s hand reaching out of it.]
[Illustration ** Our traveller unclothed hanging by his feet from a
tree, and Africans whipping and jobbing him, and filling
his mouth with soap.]
Then I was pleased to recognize
Two thumbscrews suited to my size,
And I was very glad to see
That they were going to torture me.
I find the torture pays me best,
It simply teems with interest.
They hung me up above the floor
Head downwards by a rope;
They thrashed me half an hour or more,
They filled my mouth with soap;
They jobbed me with a pointed pole
To make me lose my self-control,
But they did not succeed.
Till (if it’s not too coarse to state)
There happened what I simply hate,
My nose began to bleed.
Then, I admit, I said a word
Which luckily they never heard;
But in a very little while
My calm and my contemptuous smile
Compelled them to proceed.
They filed my canine teeth to points
And made me bite my tongue.
They racked me till they burst my joints,
And after that they hung
A stone upon my neck that weighed
At least a hundred pounds, and made
Me run like mad for twenty miles,
And climb a lot of lofty stiles.
They tried a dodge that rarely fails,
The tub of Regulus with nails--
The cask is rather rude and flat,
But native casks are all like that--
The nails stuck in for quite an inch,
But did I flinch? I did not flinch.
[Illustration ** Our traveller trapped in a nail-studded barrel
singing and the barrel being rolled by an African.]
In tones determined, loud, and strong
I sang a patriotic song,
Thank Heaven it did not last for long!
My misery was past;
My superhuman courage rose
Superior to my savage foes;
They worshipped me at last.
With many heartfelt compliments,
They sent me back at their expense,
And here I am returned to find
The pleasures I had left behind.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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