English poetry -- 19th century; Great Britain -- Colonies -- Africa -- Poetry; Humorous poetry, English
Well, through a curious stroke of luck,
That very afternoon he struck
A new concern, in which,
By industry and honest ways,
He grew (to his eternal praise!)
In something less than sixty days
Inordinately rich.
Let me describe what he became
The day that he succeeded,--
Though, in the searching light that Fame
Has cast on that immortal name,
The task is hardly needed.
The world has very rarely seen
A deeper gulf than stood between
The men who were my friends.
And, speaking frankly, I confess
They never cared to meet, unless
It served their private ends.
Sin loved the bottle, William gold;
’Twas Blood that bought and Sin that sold,
In all their mutual dealings.
Blood never broke the penal laws;
Sin did it all the while, because
He had the finer feelings.
Blood had his dreams, but Sin was mad:
While Sin was foolish, Blood was bad,
Sin, though I say it, was a cad.
(And if the word arouses
Some criticism, pray reflect
How twisted was his intellect,
And what a past he had!)
But Blood was exquisitely bred,
And always in the swim,
And people were extremely glad
To ask him to their houses.
Be not too eager to condemn:
It was not he that hunted them,
But they that hunted him.
In this fair world of culture made
For men of his peculiar trade,
Of all the many parts he played,
The part he grew to like the best
Was called “the self-respecting guest.”
And for that very reason
He found himself in great request
At parties in the season,
Wherever gentlemen invest,
From Chelsea to Mayfair.
From Lath and Stucco Gate, S.W.,
To 90, Berkeley Square.
The little statesmen in the bud,
The big provincial mayor,
The man that owns a magazine,
The authoress who might have been;
They always sent a card to Blood,
And Blood was always there.
At every dinner, crush or rout,
A little whirlpool turned about
The form immoveable and stout,
That marked the Millionaire.
[Illustration ** Men in evening dress (tailcoats), with Blood, who
is quite stout, in the center.]
Sin (you remember) could not stay
In any club for half a day,
When once his name was listed;
But Blood belonged to ninety-four,
And would have joined as many more
Had any more existed.
Sin at a single game would lose
A little host of I.O.U.’s,
And often took the oath absurd
To break the punters or his word
Before it was completed.
Blood was another pair of shoes:
A man of iron, cold and hard,
He very rarely touched a card,
But when he did he cheated.[2]
[2]
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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