Then he told me, in a trembling voice, with the tears pouring down his
cheeks, how he had gone up to her, trying to take her in his arms, but
she had drawn away and begged him not to touch her. He implored her not
to leave him. He told her how passionately he loved her, and reminded
her of all the devotion he had lavished upon her. He spoke to her of
the happiness of their life. He was not angry with her. He did not
reproach her.
“Please let me go quietly, Dirk,” she said at last. “Don’t you
understand that I love Strickland? Where he goes I shall go.”
“But you must know that he’ll never make you happy. For your own sake
don’t go. You don’t know what you’ve got to look forward to.”
“It’s your fault. You insisted on his coming here.”
He turned to Strickland.
“Have mercy on her,” he implored him. “You can’t let her do anything so
mad.”
“She can do as she chooses,” said Strickland. “She’s not forced to
come.”
“My choice is made,” she said, in a dull voice.
Strickland’s injurious calm robbed Stroeve of the rest of his
self-control. Blind rage seized him, and without knowing what he was
doing he flung himself on Strickland. Strickland was taken by surprise
and he staggered, but he was very strong, even after his illness, and
in a moment, he did not exactly know how, Stroeve found himself on the
floor.
“You funny little man,” said Strickland.
Stroeve picked himself up. He noticed that his wife had remained
perfectly still, and to be made ridiculous before her increased his
humiliation. His spectacles had tumbled off in the struggle, and he
could not immediately see them. She picked them up and silently handed
them to him. He seemed suddenly to realise his unhappiness, and though
he knew he was making himself still more absurd, he began to cry. He
hid his face in his hands. The others watched him without a word. They
did not move from where they stood.
“Oh, my dear,” he groaned at last, “how can you be so cruel?”
“I can’t help myself, Dirk,” she answered.
“I’ve worshipped you as no woman was ever worshipped before. If in
anything I did I displeased you, why didn’t you tell me, and I’d have
changed. I’ve done everything I could for you.”
She did not answer. Her face was set, and he saw that he was only
boring her. She put on a coat and her hat. She moved towards the door,
and he saw that in a moment she would be gone. He went up to her
quickly and fell on his knees before her, seizing her hands: he
abandoned all self-respect.
“Oh, don’t go, my darling. I can’t live without you; I shall kill
myself. If I’ve done anything to offend you I beg you to forgive me.
Give me another chance. I’ll try harder still to make you happy.”
“Get up, Dirk. You’re making yourself a perfect fool.”
He staggered to his feet, but still he would not let her go.
“Where are you going?” he said hastily. “You don’t know what
Strickland’s place is like. You can’t live there. It would be awful.”
“If I don’t care, I don’t see why you should.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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